Full text of "The Creative Woman"

FheCreati^e^ornan

Quarterly

FALL 1980

The
f Creatine

^WOniail A quarterly, Governors State University, Park Forest South, IL 60466.

Vol. 4, No. 2 FALL 1980

A quarterly published at Governors State University under the auspices of the Provost's Office © 1980, Governors State University and Helen Hughes
STAFF ADVISORY COUNCIL

Helen E. Hughes, Editor
Lynn Thomas Strauss, Managing Editor
Joan Lewis, Editorial Consultant
Suzanne Oliver, Graphic Designer

GUEST EDITOR

Marge Sharp

Donna Bandstra, Social Sciences

Rev. Ellen Dohner, Religion

Rita Durrant, League of American Penwomen

Dottie Fisk, Children's Creativity

Ann Gerhart, Women's Networking

Harriet Gross, Sociology I Women's Studies

Helene Guttman, Biological Sciences

Mimi Kaplan, Library Resources

Young Kim, Com m unications Science

Harriet Marcus, Journalism

Elizabeth Ohm, Library Resources

Betye Saar, Fine Arts

Marjorie Sharp, Human Relations Services

Sara Shumer, Political Theory

Em ily Wasiolek, Literature

Page

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Page

3 INTRODUCTION

lo ABOUT US

4 Stereotyping of The Aged

by MoAge. ShaAp

6 How Old Are You?

by Atu ZWLi>

7 Poems *

by Joyce. lAWbmn

8 Bibliography on Women And Aging

I I. BECOMING

10 Life in "The Pea Green Boat"

by Lynn Thomca StAau&6
12 A Time of Change

by PhylLu Hu^man
14 A "Marvelous Life"

inteAview by Lynn > tAaju&6
16 My Grandmother

by Lynn Thomcu S&iaiU>6

26 HAIKU

by Lucille. PeAeAAon
26 Cherchez La Femme

by Lucille. PeAeXAon

28 For The Young At Heart

by Pauline. Goldfcaxb

29 Thinking Ahead

by Nancy Hamilton

V. FINAL THOUGHTS
31 Coping With Death

by Suzannz PAeJ>cott

36 Shadows

by Linda Bzck

37 Dying, An Integral Stage of

The Human Phenomenon:
Commentary on Writings of
Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross
by Waxy Lou Pogofifi

18
21

OUR NEEDS

Gray Panthers: First Decade
From an Idea to a Reality:
The Older Women's League
by MaAge. SltaAp
The 1981 White House Conference
On Aging

by MaAge. ShaAp

40 LETTER FROM HOLLAND

by Helm E. Hughe*

42 BOOK REVIEW

by Shannon lAoy

43 DISAPPOINTMENTS IN COPENHAGEN

by Helen E G Hughe*

25 IV. BY US

25 Ode To Fran Field

by Edith LundboAg

26 Smal I Biography

by Lucille. PctexAon

Cover photo of Annelies Romein

Title suggested by work
of Simone de Beauvoir

INTRODUCTION

Our guest editor far "The.
Coming ofi Age" is MaAforie Sharp,
M4. Sharp received her master's In
guidance and counseling faom Governors
State University in Park forest
South, Illinois, As the senior
citizen program coordinator far
Monee Toi^mship she acted as consul-
tant to Thornwood House senior
citizen complex and Eastern Will
County Senior Service. Center, where
she was responsible far organizing
the community farum far the 1981
White House Conference on Aging far
eastern Will County,

Currently with Southwest Women
Working Together, a grass roots
organization farmed to meet the
needs oft women in the community,
Mar joule Is the Older Women's Program
coordinator under a grant received
faom the Retirement Research Founda-
tion, The grant is designed to
identify and respond to the needs
oi mid- 11 fa and older women as they
experience changes in lifestyle
brought about, in part, by reduction
ofi income, retirement, divorce and
widowhood,

Marjorle's article on the
stereotyping ol the aged introduces
section 1, "About Us" by examining
the negative attitudes that so many
oft us hold toward older people.

Thoughts on the question ofi
what kind oft behavior is age.-
appropriate are o^ered by Alls
EUaa,

Also included here Is a bibli-
ography outlining some ofi the
excellent material available on the
study o£ aging.

The second section, "Becoming"
tells tlie story o£ individual lives.
It is in knowing our older citizens
as individuals and in celebrating
the contributions oft their lives
that we can ^ind meaning in our
own lives o

Senior cltlze.ns have special
needs and in "Ola Heeds," you'll
learn about several organizations
that have been actively working to
meet those needs., The Gray Panther
organization U> celebrating its
10th anniversary and can point to
many accomplishments* The Older
Women's League [OWL] Is an emeAging
organization with hard work ahead*
Our guest editor's report on the
White House Conference on Aging
details the ei farts made by our
government on behalf oft its
seniors and In farms us oft the plans
being made far the failure *

In "By Us," we have poems,
biographies , testimonies and photo-
graphs created by people oveA
65 years 0^ age a A strong glow oft
creativity Is evidenced in their
work,

Tliinklng about aging leads
naturally to thinking about death.
In "final Thouglits," Suzanne Prescott
and Linda Beck share reactions to
facing the death oft a parent. And
Mary Lou Rogofifi comments on the
work 0^ Elizabeth Kubler-Ross and
her Influential book, On Veath And
Vying,

In Helen's filnal "Letter from
Holland" (she will be home again
soon) she describes a Women's
House in Ven Hague and reelects on
the aging ofi her own parents*

finally Shannon Troy reviews
LI fa A{)ter youth: female, forty—
What Next ? by Ruth Harriet Jacobs,

AMP ALSO IN THIS ISSUE,, ,,,
OuA editor's report faom Copenhagen,
Helen shares her experiences and
reactions fallowing attendance at
the United Nations International .
Women's Conference In July*

I. out Us

STEREOTYPING OF THE AGED
bij l\aA.Qz Sktvip

The 1070 census indicated that
over 10$ of the total population in
the United States was over the age
of 65 and that approximately half
of these individuals were 75 or
older. The current census is
expected to show an increase of
46$ of those over age 65 hrought
about by the steady improvements
in medical knowledge and health
care The lower mortality rate
among the elderly, the decrease in
the birthrate and the coming of age
of those born during the early
1Q50 f s baby boom all lead to a
projection of the 65 plus population
reaching 26.5$ or 35.2 million persons.

Taking into consideration this
projected increase in the aged
population, perhaps we should
reevaluate our present emphasis
on youth and take a closer look at
how we currently view the elderly.

Fred Davis in Myths and Realities
About Senior Americans states:
"Gontemporary society, in America,
has for many years held negative
attitudes about old people. These
attitudes are held by many persons,
even the elderly themselves. The
aged are perceived as a devalued and
deviant societal minority with life
styles that appear to society in
general, as self-imposed negligence
and indifference."

This concurs with what I have
encountered. Working in the field
of aging I am freguently confronted
with the negative attitudes of
individuals towards the elderly.

Prior to writing this article I
conducted a mini -survey of twenty-five
individuals ranging in age from 19-55
regarding personal stereotypes
associated with the elderly. Each in-
dividual was asked to list at least
ten adjectives to describe the
physical and personality character-
istics they would use to describe
an elderly person.

Of the 48 different adjectives
and descriptive phrases given, an
overwhelming 72* were negative:
senile, argumentative, thoughtless,
poor listeners, wrinkled, faded,
debilitated, unattractive, slovenly,
condescending, boring, etc. The
28$ which were positive included:
caring, nurturing, knowledgeable,
insightful, kind, and humorous

Although many of the adjectives
were given more than once, the word
"senile" was used fourteen times.
According to Dr c Lionel Corbett
at a recent seminar on aging held
at Governors State University, less
than 5$ of the elderly can be diag-
nosed as seni le.

Does this indicate that most
people believe senility is inevitable?
Looney (1973) indicates it is not.
Activity, involvement and learning
new experiences are effective in
measurably slowing down this process.
In my work with middle-class, non-
institutionalized elderly I have
not found them to be "senile "
Rather, I find them to be alert,
active, insightful and knowledgeable.
Is it possible we confuse the normal
slowing down of physical responses
that comes with aging as "senility"?

^^HM

Personality descriptions such as
argumentative, opinionated, rigid
and cranky are the negative view of
what I see as fiesty, involved,
alive and concerned individuals
whose will to live and participate
is strong and healthy.,

Two interesting bits of information
also surfaced: 1) of those who used
positive adjectives, none gave any
related to physical appearances.
(Perhaps this is an indication that
beauty is only associated with youth.)
2) When subsequently asked to list
adjectives related to youth, the
predominant response was a positive
6]%, Only three individuals declined
to participate stating they could not
generalize for a particular group.

I take exception to the negative,
or lack of positive, adjectives to
describe physical appearances,,
Perhaps the trite saying "Beauty is
in the eyes of the beholder" has
some validity here In the pictures
included in this issue I see much
beauty.

I am reminded of a "before" and
"after" picture I once saw of a
45 year old woman who had undergone
plastic surgery to remove excessive
wrinkles from her face. The "before"
picture showed a warm face, full of
character lines, a face that reflected
early years spent outdoors in the
sun and wind pursuing a love of
sailing. The "after" picture
showed a face devoid of character.
Gone were the lines of laughter
around the eyes and mouth <, Gone
were the brow lines of experience.
What remained was a smooth mask. Is
this beauty? The faces of the
elderly reflect the story of their
lives. The joys and sadness, births
and deaths, hopes and dreams. . . othere
for all to see. This, to me, is
beauty. The beauty of life.

Those of us who have yet to
reach "old age" might stop and think
about these negative attitudes: 1)
what affect will they have on our

own self-image as we approach the
time when we must acknowledge that
we are "old"? and 2) what affect do
they have on the behavior of the
elderly today?

The aging person often falls
victim to these negative stereotypes.
Since a person tends to become what
he believes he will become, negative
attitudes often support negative
sel f -evaluation . There are relatively
few traits which may be described
as characteristic of old age, and
there are no traits which are
characteristic of the aged alone.
Unfortunately, the attitudes of the
young are so deeply internalized
that when they grow old, they tend
to think of themselves in a negative
way, thus falling victim to a
self-fulfilling prophesy,,

My perception of the elderly is
that there are no stereotypes. The
personality characteristics of the
elderly range through the full gamut
found in any group,, What we are at
25 or 50 is what we will be at 55
or 80, I am inclined to agree with
a quote by B. K. Smith: "The person
who reaches 60 or 70 or 80 in a
state of reasonable health carries
within him the person he was at 25
or 30 or 40. The weight of responsi-
bilities or energies or desires may
have shifted, but he maintains the
knowledge and feelings, desires and
dislikes, similar to those character-
istics of the person he was before.
Perhaps this is the most important
lesson to be learned."

Gtiow old atony ivtth me
The, beMt u> yet to be
The. ljut oi li^e, fan wlvich
the. {\iri6t t& made.

[faom Rabbt Ben EzHxi by RobeAt llnowntng)

HOW OLD ARE YOU?

How old are you?

That question to I lows you all of

your days.

There is a difference between maturing

and aging. One definition of mature

is "complete in natural growth and

development." One definition of

aging is "to bring to maturity or

a state fit for use." Consequently,

I believe that one should never

consider the mind "mature."

We are always striving to categorize
each other. Every person, in every
socio-cultural setting has heard:

"You're not old enough to do that,"
or

"Act your age,"

"Your're too old to be doing that."
Depending, of course, upon how the
teller wished to modify behavior.
A niche for everyone and everyone
in his/her niche.

How old am I?

d enough that I am a grandmother,
Young enough to be a student.

d enough to bake a cake,
Young enough to enjoy licking the
xing bowl .

How old is she?

d enough to roast a turkey,
Young enough to want to "win" her
sh on the wishbone.

d enough to real ize that the ocean
s too big to swim,
Young enough to enjoy a water fight
th squirt guns and hoses.

How old is he?

d enough to know that soap bubbles
burst,

Young enough to enjoy blowing them
Old enough to walk on the moon,
Young enough to delight in flying
paper airplanes.

How old are they?

Old enough to realize the emotional
and physical ramifications of love,
Young enough to be willing to travel
through valleys in order to reach
great heights.

Don't worry about aging — growing old
chronologically; there is no
"wrongness" in being either chronolog-
ical ly young, old, or middle aged.
"Wrongness" is in having the gift of
enjoying and appreciating life and
not using it. Be curious. Be joyful.
Be tolerant. Be aware. Love Life.

By A-U6 ElLti

AGE

Skin peeling off a window
Eyes folding into light
Hands gentled into loving
Heart shimmering in sight

AGING

Spiders attacking eyes
Rivlets flowing down
Drooping folding
Furrowed skinscape
Down hi I I I grow
Mind and body cultivated
By pain and joy
No longer smooth
Untouched untried -
A del icious raisin
With wisdom inside,.

by Joijcz IWUbnoiYi

BIBLIOGRAPHY ON WOMEN AND AGING

GENERATIONS. Sp/tuig 79S0. Uafe
Sommers, guest editor. Available
faom: Western Gerontological Society,
785 Market St , Suite 1114, San
Erancisco, CA 94103; $2,00,
An entire issue devoted to older
women, covering such topics as
research, sexuality, and work.

LIFE AFTER VOUTH: FEMALE, FORTY,

WHAT NEXT? Rath H. Jacob*. 1979, 17 6p,

Available faom: Beacon Press,

25 Beacon St., Boston, A(A Oil OS;

$10.95 hardback. A study on the.

roles oh older women in this society.

LOOKING AHEAD: A WOMAN'S GUIDE TO
THE PROBLEMS AND JO^S OF GROWING OLVER.
LiMUan E. Troll pet at. 1977, 21 6p.
Available, faom: ?n.zntice.-Hall, Inc.
Englewood CUM*, NJ 07632; ?3.95 e

OLDER WOMEN. 1978. Available. faom:
Women* & Education Resources, University
ofi Wisconsin-Extension, 610 Langdon St.
Madison, WI 53706; $1.50 Packet
with tie.pn.odu.ced &act sheets and
bi.bJtiogtiaphi.c6 .

OLVER WOMEN: A WORKSHOP GUWE.
National Commission on the Observance
oh International Women' A Year. 1977,
39p. Available fitiom: US Government
Printing O^face, Washington, VC 20402;
ottdeA No. 052-003-00490-9; $1.25.

ON WIDOWHOOD: BOOKS, RESEARCH,
RESOURCES. Sara Goodman. 1979, 55p.
Write: Sara Goodman, 34 Laurel Lane,
Longmeadow, MA 01106. Annotated
bibliography.

OVER 55 IS NOT ILLEGAL: A RESOURCE
BOOK FOR ACTIVE OLVER PEOPLE.
Erances Tenenbaum. 1979, 191 p.
Available faom: Houghton Mi^lin Co.
Two Park St., Boston, MA 02107;
$14.95 hardback, $7.95 paperback.
A guide to opportunities in education,
employment, political action, and
volunteer work.

THE GRAYING OF THE CAMPUS. Ruth
Weinstock. 1978, 120p o Available
faom: Educational Eacitities Laborator-
ies, AEV, 680 Ei^th Ave*, New York,
NY 10019; $8.00.

OW TO GET COLLEGE CREDIT FOR WHAT
YOU HAVE LEARNEV AS A HOMEMAKER AND
VOLUNTEER. Ruth Ekstrom et al. 1977,
225p. Available faom: Ruth Ekstrom,
Educational Testing Service, Princeton,
MJ 08541; $3.00.
A workbook far the re-entry woman.

so you want to go back to school:

FACING THE REALITIES OF RE-ENTRVo
Elinor Lenz and Marjorie H . Shaevitz.
1977, 252p. Available faom: McGraw-Hill
Book Co., 1221 Avenue o& the Americas,
New York, NY 10020; $4.95.

STUDY SKILLS FOR THOSE ADULTS RETURN-
ING TO SCHOOL. Jerold W. Apps 1978,
237 p. Available faom: McGraw-Hill
Book Co.,

$4.95.

PENSION EACTS 31: MYTHS AND FACTS
PENSION FACTS 32: WOMEN AND THE EACTS.
1978, 4p. each . Available faom:
Pension Rights Center, Room 1019,
1346 Connecticut Ave. NW, Washington,
VC 20036; send $.25 and selfaaddressed
stamped envelope far each copy.

SEX DISCRIMINATION IN INSURANCE: A
GUIDE FOR WOMEN. 7977, 59p.
Available faom: Women's Equity Action
League, 733 15th St a NW, Washington,
VC 20005; $1.00. prepaid.

SOCIAL SECURITY AND THE CIHANG1NG
ROLES OE MEN AMP WOMEN. 7979, 32 3p
Available, finom: Social Secunlty
Admlnl&tnatlon, Rm 446, Attmeyen
Sldg., 6401 SecunlZy Blvd Q , BaWmone,
MP 21235; tingle, copy face.*

A WOMAN'S GUIPE TO SOCIAL SECURITY.
1979. 12p. Available {nom: Consumen
lnfionmatlon Centen, Pueblo, CO
81009; face.

EDUCATIONAL FINANCIAL AIP FOR WOMEN:
AN INFORMATION PACKET* Jean Manzone,
1979. Available {nom; EDC/WEEAP

Dlstnlbutlon Centex, 39 Ckapel St a
Newton, ISA 02160 o $5 o 00 o

PAST SIXTY: THE OLDER MOHAN IN PRINT
ANP FILM. Canol Hollenshead et at.
1977 , 52p Q Available {nom: Institute
o& Gerontology Publication* , 520 East
Llbenty St., Ann Anbon, MI 48109;
$3.00 prepaid. An annotated list ofa
100 nesounces.

RETURNING WOMEN: TO WORK ANP SCHOOL
1977, 6p. Available {nom: Catalyst,
14 East 60th St., New Yonk, NY 10022;
$K50. Blbllognaphy

WOMEN IN MIPL I FF— SECURITY AMP
FULFILLMENT. US i ouse o£ Representa-
tives Select Committee on Aging. 1978,
Available faom: US Government
Pnlntlng O^lce, Washington, VC 20402.
Pant I, onden no. 052-070-04838-7,
$4 a 25; Pant II, onden no.
052-070-04839-5, $2.75. Pant I Is a
compendium o& papers on public policy
Issues and pnoblems a^ectlnp women
age 40-60. Pant II Is an annotated
blbllognaphy.

THE AGE PISCRIMIMATIOM ACT OF 7975 AMP
WOMEN ON CAMPUS. 1978. 5p,
Available finom: Project on the Status
and Education Oft Women, Association
oft Amexlcan Colleges, 1818 R St.
NW, Washington, PC 20009; single
copy face. A summary ofi the Act,
which became elective Jan. 1, 1979
Is Included.

GENERAL INFORMATION FOR THE RETURNING
STUVENT. Catalyst Publications.
CAREER OPPORTUNITIES Senles. $1.50.
SELF-RELIANCE Senles. $1.75.
RESUME PREPARATION MATERIALS, $4,75
Available finom: Catalyst, 14 East
60th St. New Yonk, NY 10022.

EVUCATION FOR PERSPECTIVE TRANSFORMATION:
WOMEN'S RE-ENTRy PROGRAMS IM COMMUNITY
COLLEGES. Jack MexxAow. 1978, 59p.
Available {rom: ERIC Document
Repnoduction Service, Box 190 Antington,
l/A 222/0. ED 166 367, Results faom
a study o£ 350 pnognams.

[Material {on this blbllognaphy was
gathened {nom RESOURCE ROUNDUP: pnlnted
by Women' s Educational EqulXy
Communications Netioonk a
1855 Volsom St a San Francisco, CA 94103)

LIFE IN "THE PEA GREEN BOAT"

bij Lynn ThomaA S&iauAA

Kate Steichen, now 72, has
lived in Wilton, Connecticut since
1943 when she and her "beloved
friend of 50 years," Carol Silverberg
anchored their home "The Pea Green
Boat" next to a beautiful Wilton
pond.

The appreciation that Hiss
Steichen feels for the abundance
of the world outside her home is
reflected within through the romp-
ings of her three cats, and a wealth
of books, paintings, sculptures,
and photographs.

Miss Silverberg's death last year
has left Kate the sole skipper of
"The Pea Green Boat" and helped
her decide to share some of her
treasures with the community that
has meant so much to her. Because
the Wilton Library "has always been
so wonderful to Carol and me,"

she donated 50 signed first editions
to its annual rare book auction
this fall.

Looking out over the terrace
one is reminded by the UN flag
which has flown there in the woods
since 1943 that Kate has roots
extending far beyond Connecticut,
Her birthplace is France where she
grew up in the village of Voulangis
in the Brie country. She early
developed an interest in singing.
Coming to America as a child speaking
only French, she made her "debut"
at the age of six in Edgartown, Mass.
singing French folksongs, with "La
Marseillaise" as her encore. Before
pursuing a career in book publishing
she sang with the WPA opera and con-
cert artists' project,.

Her roots extend as well to
Luxembourg, the ancestral home of
her father photographer Edward
Steichen. Mr. Steichen is best
known for his great exhibit "The
Family of Man," done while he was
director of photography at the
Museum of Modern Art.

Earlier this year Miss Steichen
visited Luxembourg for the first time.
Dozens of cousins greeted her with
dozens of roses and proudly intro-
duced her to everyone from the
Grand Duchess to the youngest
Steichen. While there she presented
her gift of three sets of her
adored late stepmother Dana Steichen' s
only book Beethoven's Beloved ,
to the Luxembourg National Public
Library and the new Beethoven Museum
at Vianden.

"The giving was a joy," said
Miss Steichen.

Many of the books Miss Steichen
donated to the Wilton Library for
auction were acquired during her ten
years working as administrative
assistant to the editor-in-chief
of Doubleday & Company. During

those years she lived with Miss Of her life in "The Pea Green

Silverberg in a third floor walkup Boat," she says, "We had a magnificent

just off Patchin Place in the Village, last 10 years which we mostly

overlooking the doorways of e e. devoted to work for the United

cummings, Edna St. Vincent Millay, Nations." She adds, "We had a

Marion Morehouse and Pjuna Barnes. wonderful time all our lives,

Of what Miss Steichen calls
her Doubleday Days she says, "I
had a ball in publishing, it was
hard work and hard play."

All of Kate's life seems to
hold a warm and vibrant richness. Since
retiring from Doubleday Kate and
Carol manned the front lines of many
a Wilton battle. They helped to
save the Hurl butt Street School house,
which is now an historic site and
community center. They worked to
found Wilton's AID (Animals in
Distress), protested the aerial
spraying of trees, and worked for
the creation of the new Wilton Library.

Kate spent childhood summers
on the Kent, Connecticut farm of her
aunt and uncle.

"It was Aunt Charlotte who
inculcated me in this," she says,
gesturing toward the pond. "If
it wasn't for her I wouldn't have
this place. I was enormously
enriched by being with her."

"Every year from when I was
a young girl I would be given a
bunch of goslings or a young heifer
to raise myself. Of course they
all ended up in the pot, but I never
knew that. I did my work and had
my chores: we didn't have electri-
city and we had 20-something lamps
to clean every morning. But after
lunch I would be out in my bloomers,
middy blouse and bare feet, out on
my own."

In "Aunt Kate" (an affectionate
local nickname) the Steichen spirit
has shone bright. The fabric of
her life has been rich in color
and in style.

which is also a Steichen trait."

A TIME OF CHANGE

by VkijttUi Madman

Becoming a senior citizen, just
like starting school or becoming a
teenager, is a time of change. For
some it is a time of isolation, despair
and a feeling that the best of life
is over. For others, it is a time
of life which is both exciting and
chal lenging.

"Don't be afraid to retire — it's
wonderful," advises Cleone Kamphenkel.
"You have to keep busy and sometimes
have to work at getting yourself
out and going. But if you look
around there is always someone worse
off than yourself."

Cleone, a widow who lives alone
in her Monee home, follows her own
advice. She is president of the
Women's Guild at St c Paul's United
Church of Christ, helps with the
Church's Bible School, is a member
of Delta Kappa Gamma and the Monee
Women's Club. As a retired teacher,
she also does some substitute
teaching in area schools.

Traveling is Cleone's hobby „ This
summer she visited North Carolina and
Williamsburg, Virginia. Most of the
time she travels with Lucy, a friend
she met a few years ago on a
tour of Europe. Together, Lucy and
Cleone have made three trips to
Hawaii, where they rent an apartment
for a month and live like the natives.
Lucy, like Cleone, is a retired
teacher and the widow of a minister.
The two have enjoyed seeing much of
the United States together.

Cleone spends holidays with her
daughter, son-in-law, an 18 year
old grandson, and a granddaughter
who is in college. She finds that
Sundays and evenings can sometimes
be lonely. She tries to fill these
long hours with visiting friends,
knitting, needlepoint, baking, and
canning her specialty, dilly beans.

Cleone's major concern is for her
future. "I don't want to become sick
and become a burden. Health is more
important than wealth."

91 -year-old Leo I a Emde agrees
with Cleone: "I'm independent
and like to do things for myself. It
takes me longer to do things now than
it used to, but I hope I never
become a burden to my family."

Leola lives in her own apartment,
which her daughter and son-in-law
built for her at the back of their
Monee home. She has been a widow
since 1939. Even though her hands
are crippled with arthritis she
does everything but her laundry
for herself.

Keeping up her apartment, cooking
meals, attending Women's Guild, and
the Monee Senior Citizens at St.
Paul's United Church of Christ
occupy Leola's days. She also makes
jam, bread and butter pickles and
likes to write letters to her friends.
"I never stop with one page when I
write letters; there are always
three or four pages," says Leola.
"With arthritis I do not write as

we I I as I used to, but everyone
says they can read it, so I keep
writing." One of the people with
whom Leo I a corresponds is her aunt who
is 100 years old.

Because her eyesight is not as
good as it once was, she no longer
goes out alone, but her daughter
and friends take her shopping, for
rides and out to luncho She enjoys
visiting her grandson and his wife
who live in Beecher with their two
children. Leola f s eyes light up
when she talks about her two great-
grandchildren and she proudly displays
their pictures.

Evenings are sometimes long for
Leola, too, and she wishes that her
arthritis did not keep her from
crocheting, sewing and playing the
piano as she used to do. Evenings
are taken up with reading, as much as
her eyesight will allow, and watching
television.

Ruth and Dan Brunnick have an
apartment in Thornwood House, a
senior citizen residence in Park
Forest South, But with all the
activities they are involved in,
they do not spend much time there.

"As long as we're able to go —
we work," commented Dan "I never
had time for much social life before
I retired because I did shift work
and Ruth had five children to raise."
Ruth was, however, active in church
and community work while she was
raising her fami ly.

Family still keeps the Brunnicks
busy. With eleven grandchildren and
three great-grandchildren there are
many birthdays and holidays to
celebrate together with those who
live nearby. A trip to Kansas City
is planned for Easter to visit family
there.

Dan is coordinator of the Thornwood
House Association to which all of
the building's residents belong, Ruth
is the program chairman. Under their
guidance Thornwood House residents

have been active in village affairs
acting as recorders and leaders
for town meetings, entering a float
in the Labor Day parade, sponsoring
a first place baseball team for two
years in a row and winning the Park
Forest South Booster of the Year
Award as an association.

"We have to keep busy so that we
don't have time to realize that we are
getting old," says Ruth„ Busy they
are! Being interested in keeping up
with what is going on in the world,
they took a five week course in
political science at Governors State
University. They also are members
of the Senior Action Forum, the
Senior Citizens Advisory Board at
Prairie State College and the Crete
Upper Crust of which Dan is vice-
president. Ruth even finds time to
play the piano at Thornwood House
for Mass.

Dan and Ruth feel the major con-
cerns of Eastern Will County senior
citizens are: 1) dissatisfaction
with medicare, since it does not
cover the entire cost of medical
care and doctors' fees; 2) the
continuous rise in rents for
people on fixed incomes and the
lack of a housing authority in
Will County outside of Jol iet,
which makes it impossible for
area residents to get rent relief
through section 8 housing; and
3) the lack of public transporta-
tion to doctors and shopping for
those who are not able to drive.
These concerns will be voiced by
local representatives to the
White House Conference on Aging.

Although Leola told me that "As
one gets older, one I ives in the
past quite a bit," it was evident
that a I I the seniors I interviewed
were active people — and definitely
I iving in the 1980's.

A "MARVELOUS LIFE"

InteAview by Lynn S£taaA.6

How much can you learn of a life-
time in one hour?

What was it like to live through
two world wars, all of aviation history
and a marriage of 52 years?

How is a woman's lifetime in
Holland different — if it is — from the
life of a woman spent in America?

These were just some of the ques-
tions I had in mind when the editor
arranged for me to meet Catherina
Theodora Henny, a vigorous 81 -year-
old Dutch lady living with her husband
in their apartment in The Hague.

Mrs. Henny gave some advice, some
impressions and shared with me some
memories.

"Some things you remember all
your life", she said with a smile,
describing herself as a young girl
with long shining red hair, riding
the bus wearing a black velvet coat.
"A man said to me, 'Please don't get
off yet! I want to look at you a
bit longer,,'"

Mrs. Henny also remembers well
that after only one year of marriage,
her father died and her husband lost
his job. "I took up knitting again,"
she says. "I worked 10 or 12 hours a
day. I sold jumpers for 35fl. (about
17 american dollars) including the
woo I . "

One of the hardships of those
times was that Mrs. Henny was unable

to live with her husband and could
only visit with him weekends at a
friend's home. Therefore they had
no children and Mrs. Henny says she's
not sure what it would have been like
to be a parent — but she doesn't miss
it.

In living through the second
world war, Mrs. Henny experienced many
things. "In one way it was a terrible
time" she recalls, "But then again,
you knew who your friends were."

As a girl, Mrs. Henny wanted to
go to gymnasium (university) but
had to attend a girl's school instead,
where she learned to cook and keep
house.

Her artistic ability was dis-
covered at age 16 by the famous Dutch
artist Anton Pieck, when he saw one
of her etchings in someone's home
and asked her to study and work with
him. She became his apprentice and
sold her work.

When describing herself, Mrs.
Henny says, "I am not so feminine.
I am a little bit manly, I don't
like to wear earrings. I am a little
bit classic."

She is busy all day„ Mrs. Henny
has been driving her own car for
66 years. Sometimes she does her
grocery shopping on her bicycle and
she plays golf several times a week,
weather permitting.

She has been a "member of honor"
in her golf club for 60 years. And
many years ago she founded the first
Women's Golf Commission In Holland.
She also served as president of her
local club until stepping down at
age 65.

"We travel many places with the
golf club; we have tea after the game
and it is very nice" says Mrs. Henny.
"When I'm a little bit tired, I go
play golf and come home feeling fine."

When asked what she thinks of the
women's movement, Mrs. Henny says,
"I I i ke that women have more to say
now. But its not all to the good —
some women can't cook and they
aren't there when the children come
home from school. The children
aged 13 or 14 are on drugs, are stealing,
are more aggressive — that was unknown
in my day."

At 81 years of age Mrs Henny has
very few complaints. She says,
quite convincingly, "I had a marvel-
ous life." She attributes much of
her happy life to having had good
friends.

When asked how she stays so
healthy, she advises, "Keep busy.
Unless it's very, very needed, don't
take pills. Be systematic, do first
the thing you have to do, then the
thing you want to do."

Mrs. Henny recently discovered
that a childhood friend who had
lived next door to her family and
was I i ke a sister to her, is once
again living in an apartment close
to her.

"Now," says Mrs. Henny, "now,
we will finish as we started."

MY GRANDMOTHER

by Lynn Tkomcu S£/iauA6

I've known my grandmother all my
life and still she doesn't share much
about the things that matter to her.
Now in her eighties and living in
a senior citizens' high rise in
Chicago, I feel closer to her than
at any other time in my life.

She enjoys my children, 3 of her
many great-grandchildren, much more
I'm sure, than she enjoyed my
brother and sisters and I when we
lived together in my grandparents'
small cramped apartment.

When I ask Nany about her own
childhood in a small Indiana town
and her early married life— she
gets angry for my asking. She doesn't
want to remember her own mother's
early death or collecting scraps
of coal off Chicago streets during
the depression. She did tell me
once that it was a great joy to
her when she and Poppy moved their
family into an apartment building
that had central heating.

From the time I was three until
I was eight years old we lived
with Nany and Poppy in their four
room flat. They ran a cigar store
next to where we lived. There was
a huge double yard behind the house
and a path leading to the back door
of the store.

Nany was always working in the
store; cleaning, ordering, organizing
stock or waiting on customers. She
didn't play with us kids much but
she let us help her in the store. We
washed the candy counter windows,
carried pop bottles to the dark
cellar and even waited on customers
when we were tall enough.

Nany didn't go out much, but
everyone came into the store — so
she knew everyone. The firemen

from the fire station, the lady from
the bakery, the nurses from the old
folks home across the street. Everyone
came in to buy cigarettes, gum, maga-
zines, hand dipped ice cream cones
in summer and warm bottles of Kayo
pop in the winter.

There was no phone or bathroom in
the store and I remember Nany
rushing back and forth on the path
between the store and the house. She
was always working. The store was
open six days a week from 8 AM to
9 PM. Often my mother would work
in the store to give Nany a break
and she would sit down and put her
feet up and read a newspaper or
magazine before going back to work.
I don't remember her taking much
time out to eat or sleep.

When Nany had to work too hard, I
didn't notice how pretty she was.
Now there are times when she looks
absolutely glamorous. She is petite
and graceful and her hair— which she
has always done herself— is still
shiny and beautiful. She likes to
wear bright colors, especially green.
For special evening celebrations
she wears a lovely floor length
green and silver satiny dress and she
sparkles as she glides along dancing
with my brother or my father.

One of her hobbies is playing
pool in the recreation room in her
building. And she will shyly, but
proudly admit that she can beat
almost everyone including the men.

Nany has given me many gifts in
my life. As a child she gave me
candy, ice cream and comic books and
even now when she visits, she always
brings a shopping bag with gifts
of food, She let me live with her
when I was a small child and my
parents could find no place for us
to live. I appreciate now all that
she shared with me during those
years. She gave me the model of a
woman working outside the home
(though always close by). She
gave me the model of an affectionate

marital relationship as I watched my
grandfather massage her weary feet
at night. She gave me the model of
a physically strong and independent
woman who traveled alone on city
buses to the Loop and beyond. And
after my grandfather died and their
store was torn down, she gave me a
model of a woman who could survive
and survive well .

And now she continues to give me
love and caring as she hesitates to
tell my four year old daughter her
own true age because she thinks it
might scare her to imagine a person
could be that old. And she calls
me to see how I am and gives me
money for my birthday that she
cannot afford. I accept her gifts
as I know she accepts my love for
her— with deep appreciation, though
of course Nany and I never talk of
these things.

fi ! ; * i \ s

HAPPY TENTH ANNIVERSARY TO THE
GRAY PANTHERS!

GRAY PANTHERS: FIRST DECADE

Ten years ago Maggie Kuhn faced
forced retirement from a long career
of involvement. She was determined
to remain in the mainstream, working
for social change rather than be
put out to pasture c So she sent a
memo to five of her friends who
had worked with her in the Presby-
terian Church and were also "of
retirement age " "Older persons
in our society constitute a great
national resource which has largely
been unrecognized, undervalued, and
unused," she wrote,, "The purpose
of our meeting Is to consider how
retirees can be involved in new and
really significant ways.... There
should be no limit to our thinking
and dreaming."

Dream as they did they never
imagined they were launching what
would become a unique intergenera-
tional movement with a network of
over 100 local groups in 35 states
and over 50,000 supporters across
the nation. Nor did they forsee
Maggie Kuhn becoming a national
leader and spokesperson.

As Gray Panthers have worked
to develop new ways of thinking and
new models in society, they have also
strived to create an organization
which breaks away from the traditional
mold.

The Gray Panthers felt it was
crucial that no one should be
excluded because of economic, social,
or political circumstances. Thus
the ideas of membership, dues,

qualifications and credentials were
rejected; anyone could participate
whether they worked within a local
group or not as long as s/he was In
general agreement with the goals and
purposes of the Gray Panthers.

A second basic principle was that
all ages were to be included and
there would be no seniority. Younger
members were encouraged and welcomed.
Initially, however, the younger
people, dubbed ^ubs 1 felt they were
not taken seriously,, This led, in
1972, to a vigorous protest in which
the younger members accused their
older colleagues of practicing a
form of ageism. They demanded a
revision of the "Purposes and Goals"
so that they included all ages.

The Gray Panthers were conceived
as a grassroots organization and
to that end a series of local groups
were started. Hence they were
called networks to exemplify both
their autonomy and yet their inter-
dependence. From the first few
groups the movement has indeed become
a network with over 100 groups working
on a variety of local, state and
national issues. The Gray Panthers
have avoided the bl ight of most
organizations — bureaucracy. With
over 50,000 members there is a
national office staff of only six.
And as much as possible problems are
dealt with on an individual basis.

Gray Panthers have emphasized
shared decision making between its
national staff, a steering committee
with representatives from across
the nation and local network conveners,
And to ensure that every voice is
heard a national convention is
held every two years where all the
members share in the formulation of
national programs and policies.
The major decisions are then acted
upon by the steering committee and
the national office.

But perhaps the most Important
achievement of the past decade is
the most intangible — that of changing
the way a nation thinks about its
older people. How do you measure
this impact? There are some concrete
examples* Who would have envisioned
ten years ago seeing hair coloring
ads espousing the beauty of gray
hair? Television and film portraying
an increasing number of positive
images of older people? Colleges
and universities instituting gerontol-
ogy and geriatric programs and recruit-
ing older students? A mushrooming
awareness among older persons that
they do indeed have something to
contribute?

As we enter into this
it is a time for renewal
to our role as activists
and as an organizational
on human I iberation. As
we must constantly keep

new decade
of dedication
and advocates
mode I based
we do so
in mind that

whatever our age, we are all inter-
related and interdependent and that
the issues which we work for — health
maintenance, adequate income,
accessible and affordable transporta-
tion, nursing home reform and housing
options to name a few—reflect our
shared humanity. As Maggie put it
at our most recent convention, "We
have the sun and the moon and the
people on our side, we have hope
and a vision of tomorrow, but most
of all we have each other."

the. JuZy/AuguAt 1980 1&6U& o£

Gnay Vanthvi UoAwnk. 3635 Ckz&tnwt

Sbiidt VkiladelpkU, PA. 19104)

THE GRAY PANTHERS HAVE HAD AN
INELUENCEo...

HEALTH

In 1974 Gray Panthers went after
the American Medical Association by
staging guerilla theater skits
outside the AMA convention in Chicago,
Gray Panthers dressed as doctors
and nurses came to the aid of the
stricken AMA, but — alas — were unable
to find their patient's "heart."

NURSING HOMES

Gray Panthers were the first
group to organize people across
the country to reform nursing homes.
Springing out of their work was the
book Nursing Homes; A Citizens Action
Guide, written and researched by
Gray Panthers Linda Horn and El ma
Griesel. In 1975, Gray Panthers
Long Term Care Action Project formed
the National Citizens Coalition for
Nursing Home Reform.

MEDIA

For the past six years Gray
Panthers have been monitoring the
media in an effort to isolate and
eliminate negative portrayals of
old people. The National Gray
Panther Media Watch Task Force saw
the fruits of their labor on February
26, 1979 when the "Lou Grant Show"
was aired. Media Watch Chairperson
Lydia Bragger hailed it as "the best,
the very best show about older people
that we have seen yet." The National
Gray Panther office, the Media Watch
Task Force and Gray Panthers on the
west coast were but a few of the
people contacted to gather ideas and
information for the show.

MANDATORY RETIREMENT

After an official stance was taken
in June, 1976 opposing mandatory
retirement, the Gray Panthers lobbied
extensively for legislation which
would put an end to the practice.

In 1978 they won a partial victory
which raised the age of mandatory
retirement to 70. They continue to
lobby for a complete lifting of
the age I imit.

tion to regulate the industry and new
FDA regulations to curb abuse in the
industry.

SMALL SAVERS

On October 18, 1978, the Gray
Panthers filed a class action petition
before the Federal Reserve Board and
four other federal agencies e They
sought to raise interest rates on
small saver accounts. The amount at
issue was $17.5 bAJULion per annum —
the difference between maximum rates
paid to small savers and the free
enterprise market rates paid to the
wealthy.

Labelling the government's maximum
interest rates on small savings "the
greatest fraud in American history,"
the Gray Panthers almost single
handed I y campaigned and testified
for over a year.

Fourteen months after the filing of
this class action administrative
petition, following five congressional
hearings, combined with support from
numerous minority women and consumer
allies, the regulatory bodies partially
capitulated. They agreed to raise
the small saver passbook rate by
$1.2 billion a year and to permit a
new thirty-month small saver certificate
bearing high interest in denominations
as small as ten dollars.

HEARING AIDS

Merging with Ralph Nader's Retired
Professional Action Group in 1974
which had just completed an extensive
16 month investigation of the sale of
hearing aids, Gray Panthers helped
publish and distribute their report
entitled Paying Through The Ear . The
report described instances of fraud
and suggested model laws for the
regulation of hearing aid dealers. In
the following months old and young
Gray Panthers testified at several
hearings on the widespread abuse in
the sale of hearing aids. Their efforts
resulted in the enactment of I eg i si a-

PHOTO BY ARMIN WENG

FROM AN IDEA TO A REALITY:
THE OLDER WOMEN'S LEAGUE

by Mange. SkaAp

It's the week of October 9,
1980 and over 400 women from all
parts of the country have gathered
in Des Moines, Iowa for a mini -confer-
ence on older women. They are defin-
ing the problems and offering
solutions to develop an older women's
platform to be given to delegates
to the 1981 White House Conference
on Aging scheduled to convene in
Washington, D.C. in December of
1981.

Two remarkable women, Tish
Sommers, 66, and Laurie Shields,
60, of Oakland, California, co-found-
ers of the Alliance for Displaced
Homemakers, have been working on
an idea they feel is vital if older
women are to have any say about
their lives. They have asked the
women to stay an extra day, at their
own expense, to "birth" a new
organization. An organization,
according to Ms. Sommers, which will
deal only with the concerns of the
older woman, with a platform evolved

from the problems defined durinq the
last two days, a concrete plan of
action, and a democratically elected
leadership. A grass-roots activist
organization to be called "The Older
Women's League."

Perhaps the best way to describe
the ideas and concerns that went
into establishing this new organiza-
tion is to use Tish's own words as they
appeared in Cover Letter , a periodical
published by the Older Women's
League Educational Fund, a two-year
non-profit research group that pub-
lished the Gray Papers on major issues
affecting older women.

"If the displaced homemaker
movement proved nothing else, it
proved that once aroused and mobil-
ized, older women can develop
political clout. That clout is
needed because there is so much to
be done. Take access to health
care insurance, for example. How
many women find themselves widowed
or divorced and ineligible for health
insurance which provides decent
coverage and which they can afford?
There is a gap in public health
service during that time between
family planning and Medicare, because
access to decent coverage is avail-
able only by virtue of employment
or as a dependent of an eligible
worker.

....Controversies around social
security are heating up as well.
Pressures to limit benefits, especi-
ally those of dependents, or to
decrease cost of living advances,
make it clear that there is much to
be done to defend the gains that have
been made. On the other hand, women's
organizations are becoming more
involved in social security and pension
issues, which opens the door to new
collaboration in these areas.

....The list of issues could go on
and on, and probably will as long
as we live. But political action —
COLLECTIVE POLITICAL ACTION— can
chip away at all these inequities

and bring about positive social
change* Of course, there are
strong currents of opposition but they
must not prevaiU We remain silent at
our own peri I .

....We have been building a network
of older women activists and advocates,
recognizing that our common interest
will only be effectively served when
WE SPEAK OUT IN OUR OWN BEHALF! ....The
time is ripe to turn our longtime
dream into reality by launching the
Older Women's League. Now is the
time to recruit members, build
chapters all over the country,
mobilizing our growing numbers into
an effective force "

dependent on the benefits of our
spouses.

OWL expects to have active
chapters in every state by next
year and a national headquarters
in Washington, D.C. For those of
you who feel as I do, and would like
to learn more about the League,
write OWL, 3800 Harrison Street,
Oakland, CA 9461 U

And turn a dream into reality
is just what they did On October
11, 1980, the Older Women's League
was foundedc Issues which will
receive top priority include improve-
ment of the ret i rement- income laws;
supporting pension bills in Congress
so that divorced and widowed women
are entitled to their former spouses'
pension funds, and improving access
to health care insurance.

Ms. Sommers is particularly
sensitive to the need for some form
of affordable insurance for older
women. She lost her coverage under
her husband's policy when she divorced
him at the age of 57. With a history
of cancer, she was unable to find
any company which would insure her c
Six months before she became eligible
for Medicare the cancer returned. She
was obligated to pay for the
expensive radiation treatments from
her own pocket.

As an older woman, I strongly
feel the need to support this
energetic and politically active
group — to "speak out" on my own
behalf. For the first time we
have an organization that is inter-
ested in the problems of older women,
problems which differ largely because
many of us have not been employed
where we have been able to accumulate
benefits »n our own right and are

ADDRESSING THE NEEDS OF OLDER
AMERICANS: THE 1981 WHITE
HOUSE CONFERENCE ON AGING
by MaAge. ShcJvp

During the past 20 years the
federal government has held two
White House Conferences on Aging to
address both the short and long
range issues of concern to the
aging population, and to seek
recommendations for resolving these
issueso

These previous conferences identi-
fied gaps in governmental programs.
The resultant increase in federal
spending produced an expansion of
the number of social organizations
to serve the older American, intro-
duced subsidized medical and health
care, subsidized nutritional programs,
and increased the amount of state and
local funding allocated to organiza-
tions serving the aged.

Since the spring of 1980 local
communities throughout the United
States have been holding Community
Forums to provide a means for
public discussion around the implica-
tions of an aging society. Elderly
residents, local politicians, agency
personnel, and citizens of all ages
have been invited to give their
views and recommendations of what is
needed over the next ten years. Such
discussions also serve to increase
awareness within the community of
the problems encountered by their
elderly population.

When President Carter announced
the appointment of the leadership
of the 1981 Conference he stated:
"...It is very important that we
recognize the need for elderly
people to have a maximum opportunity
for self determination. Their lives
have become ever more valuable with
the passing years, because they
have contributed to their country;
they have vivid insight into the
problems and challenges of our time.
They have a broad perspective, in

having seen crises come and go. They
are completely conversant with the
elements that comprise American
society. They have confidence in
our country because they have seen
us meet similar challenges in the past.

Many elements of American societal
life can be harnessed to provide a
partnership with the aged people of
our country. In academic circles;
in business and labor; local, state
and federal agencies of government;
in community programs, churches and
other benevolent institutions; there.
is an opportunity for free inter-
change of advice and counsel,
communication and common work, to
realize the hopes and dreams of many
Americans, regardless of age...."

Although Community Forums were
instructed to address any topic or
issue which was of interest to the
participants, some discussion ideas
were put forth by the organization.
These were only suggestions and by
no means covered the complete
array of possible topics. However,
they do give a broad perspective
of the concerns of older people. Drawn
largely from the legislation that
authorized the 1981 White House
Conference on Aging they consist of
the following questions:

1) How can we as a nation provide
economic security for all older
Americans?

2) How can we safeguard the health
of aging Americans and reduce the
physical, mental and economic costs
of poor health?

3) How can older Americans be
assured of a satisfactory living
environment, including suitable
housing and the supports needed for
an independent life?

4) How can we assure an adequate
share of resources and attention
to redress the imbalances which
still persist among minority aged
who suffer multiple jeopardies?

5) How can retired Americans develop
and pursue increasingly productive
and fulfilling roles in their later
years?

6) How can we assure productive
and rewarding employment for those
older Americans who wish to work?

7) What social policies and services
are needed to strengthen the resources
of the increasing number of families
with two generations of elderly persons?

8) How can we direct adequate resour-
ces to support those elderly persons
who are particularly vulnerable and

at risk?

9) What should be the place of the
religious community in ministering
to the needs of the elderly?

10) What needs to be done with respect
to increasing , coordinating and
expediting biomedical and other
research directed at determining

the causes of aging?

The operational design of the
Conference consists of two phases.
Phase I will focus on local and
state sponsored activities between
May of 1980 and May of 1981. These
activities will hopefully:

1) develop an awareness of the
upcoming 1981 Conference,

2) provide a means for the develop-
ment of issues and recommendations
on a broad range of topics from a
variety of concerned groups and

3) provide a means for selecting
delegates to the National Conference.

The steps to achieve these
objectives will include: (1) local
Community Forums starting in May

1980, the traditional Older Americans
Month; (2) state White House Confer-
ences between September 1980 and April

1981, in every state and territory.
Topic areas will be determined by
the Advisory Committee, with each
state reporting on the issues and
recommendations covered at its
conference; (3) delegates to the
National Conference should be named
by May 1981; and (4) separate
"mini -conferences" to concentrate
on specific Issues that may not
get the necessary attention during
the regular process, e.g., special
dilemma of older women, minority
aged, etc.

The program agenda for the
National Conference and the roles
and responsibilities for the entire
conference process will gradually
be clarified, and the Conference
office will provide technical
assistance to help groups link into
the conference process.

Phase II (June 1981- December 1981)
will emphasize the involvement
of the delegates and the dissemina-
tion of information to the delegates
from the activities which occurred
during Phase I. During the week
of November 30-December 4, 1981 all
delegates will gather in Washington,
D.C. for the full National Confer-
ence. The results of this confer-
ence will impact the legislation
over the next ten years.

f nan field, about whom tkih poem it>
wnitten i& Special Jntene&t Coondinaton
Ion the Pank EoneAt Ve.pamtme.wt o{,
Recneation and Pank&.

"ODE TO FRAN FIELD"

There's a person here among us
Who is known far and wide
For her cheerful disposition
And many things beside.

She heads our Senior Citizens
And points to us with pride
Though I'm sure if she'd admit it
Her patience oft we've tried.

She plans theatre parties

Lets us the show decide

Then "cons" our good Keith Higg in:

Into providing us the ride.

She loves to play at ping pong
Always on the winning side
She challenges all comers
Then takes them for a ride»

When she thinks she is stymied
And that her hands are tied
She digs right in, gets on the phone
And gets help from outside.

One day when we were meeting
The air conditioning "died"
She got so hot, she couldn't work
till she her scarf untied!

Her appetite at pot lucks

She never has denied

She loves and eats the food brought in

Be it broiled, baked or fried.

How many pounds that she has gained
Cannot from her be pryed
But where those pounds have landed
Can only be imp I ied.

Her love for teens and children
She never tries to hide
I'm sure they all are grateful
To have had her as their guide.

Now Fran, we want to thank you
All puns and jokes aside
May God bless and keep you
As he walks along your side.

by Edith Lundbong

MISS EDITH SODERBORG

HFHIS Modern young woman
will assist you to open either
a Checking or Savings Account,
and we have every confidence
that the courteous and efficient
manner with which she serves
you, will at once make you feel
like a member of our large and
happy family of depositors.

About The, kuthon — Bonn many yean& ago
on the. South Side, of, Chicago, ol panentA
who wene bonn in Sweden, but mannied
Jin Chicago. Educated in Eel&enthal
gnamman and Hyde. Pank High School*.
Lived in Woodlawn, then Aome ii^ty
yexvu in South Shone., whene I woa active
in many civic gnoupA and clubA. Memben
o£ Southfield MethocLtit Chunch oveA
lonty yeanA. Memben o£ PaAt Pne&identA
Club , SwedLuh Pioneen Society,
Amenican Daughter ol Sweden, EaAtenn
Will County SenionA. Pne&ent TneoAunen
o{ Smant Set SenionA of, Anbon TnailA.
widowed — one daughteA, one Aon —
9 gKa.ndichUAn.en, 7 gneat-gnandchilAnen.

SMALL BIOGRAPHY

HAIKU

1 1 ive in the country, where 1

Woman

have lived for forty years, but 1

was born and grew up in Joliet,

From Adam she came

Illinois. Here my father was a

Reproducing, nurturing

streetcar motorman„ This will

Today, she can choose,.

tell you where 1 fit on the

age scale.

Soon after 1 was married, my

Cloister or Bower

husband and 1 bought this rural home

with some acreage. Now, 1 am a

Age - blessing or curse

widow with two lovely daughters

Wisdom should be our measure

and four beautiful (of course, to

Not units of years

me) granddaughters. Also, a cat

called "Muffet" and some wonderful

neighbors and friends.

From the Spheres

To create some new demands upon

my time, 1 began watered or and

Music is beauty,

creative writing courses through

With its sounds, it quickens

the local junior college. Since

the soul

a young girl, 1 have been scribbling.

And stirs the mind afresh.

Since my retirement, 1 now take the

time to enjoy this pastime. 1 also

love to read and walk in my woods.

Next to these, 1 enjoy gardening,

Phoenix Rising

painting and good conversation. 1

love all the seasons — even the quiet

This country 1 love

isolation a sudden snowstorm can

Chose, E Pluribus Unum

bring.

Out of many - One.

by Lucille. VztoJi&on

by Lucitle. PzteA&on

CHERCHEZ LA FEMME - LOOK TO THE WOMAN
by LilcaJULz. C. VztoA&on

Who art thou? Are you from Eve,
Aphrodite or Pandora?

Today, women are in the forefront
of the news. We are noted, quoted
and counted. We are grist for the
mill of the media in all forms.
Many books and articles have been
written and they attempt to cite
just where we are today, or wish to be,
Some are very emphatic on what we
need to make life full and meaningful.
With our complex natures we are a
phenomenon to many of the opposite
sex. We, however, are quite aware of
who we are.

We cherish our heritage,, We
come from a long line of courageous
women. From the pioneer woman who
drove the Conestoga wagon across
the prairies and who could ably
defend herself in any real danger to
those many brave women who left their
native country to begin life here
in a strange land. Others also
came the long road from slavery to
today f s Patricia Harris. We have
travelled new, unknown, lonely
paths, without a forerunner or guide.

Once our lives were full of daily
tasks, repetitious and absorbing.
They were mandatory for the very
survival of our homes and for our
very existence. Gradually changes
came to free us from many of these.

This brought more freedom, choice
and change. We soon found ourselves
looking for other committments, and
chal lenges.

We forged onto new frontiers and
left traditions behind. We opened
windows and doors, thereby causing
needed reforms. We took off our
aprons and donned hard hats and
uniforms. We are extensive in our
roles. We drive busses, bulldozers,
and man fire hoses, drive tractors,
pilot planeSo We are to be found in
many new ventures in research and
medicine. Are we not the cohesive
force that holds the structure
together?

Today, our roles are often plural.
We combine career, marriage and
motherhood with equal aplomb. We
move, we create, we energize, not
singly, but enmasse. We are sus-
tainers, retainers and maintainers
within our lifestyles. We are
nurturers. We fortify our families
with nourishment, advice and love.
We are endowed with the wisdom of
Solomon, Mother Nature and Mother Earth
all in one.

For the older woman the twentieth
century has initiated great changes
for her. Many remember when grand-
mother was widowed and went to live
with a daughter or son. This was
an accepted way of life. What
resources she had, she took with her.
This was also the normal situation
for the single woman and for the
aunts, who all came to be part of
the family. They lived out their
remaining years dependent on the
generosity of their relatives. They
often became what we think of as
"old maids." Can we blame them?
They had to drastically adjust from
being an independent homemaker, to
much sharing and a dependency upon
others. What a contrast today's
woman presents! Most are financially
able to continue some form of
independent living. This includes
the single woman, the divorcee and
the single parent.

For the retired woman, Social
Security and pensions have given
her new freedoms. We are again
becoming forerunners. We are to
be found in all areas. We have
become organizers and joiners. We
are found in the A.A.R.P., the
A.A.R.T., and even with the Gray
Panthers. We do volunteer work in
hospitals and senior centers We
teach, lecture and some go back to
college. We join exercise classes,
hiking groups and art classes We
travel widely, play golf and dance.
Most find life opening new areas
and bringing new experiences and
friends.

For some women, loneliness may
always be a problem. We do know that
isolation does bring loneliness. To
this extent, then, whether it be
brief or prolonged, we need to feel
a kinship with all women who are
in these various roles. We know
from whence we came and we know
we are venturing into new paths, but
down through the centuries haven't
we always had a good hold on the reins?
With this thought in mind, let us
keep making progress on our journeys.
Vive le femme!

FOR THE YOUNG AT HEART

I am a senior citizen. It may
sound like an ordinary fact to
all of us, but when did I age
enough to acquire that status?
Seems yesterday I was trying on
a dress in front of the mirror,
to go dancing at the J.P.I, in
Chicago, and thinking that when
I get real old, about 26, I hope
I will be settled down into a
married life and have children
to raise.

I am a senior citizen. Rather
makes me feel like hurry, hurry
before I become old. Inside, I
am not old. Inside I can still
dance, work, go to parties, laugh
it up, and think I i ke a young
person. I can plan to make a wall
hanging, look for something to
add to the beauty of my home —
who's a senior citizen?

Me thinks, I am protesting too
much. I noticed I do walk a
little more carefully and slowly.
I do take a I ittle longer to get
through the house work, and save
time for a nap now and then.

I suppose I am a senior citizen.

about the author: I am a 70 yean, old

widow who live* in a *outk *ubunb

and keep* occupied with latch hook

nug* t embnoideny and keeping up

with hoclal climbing. &tngo and

caxd game* an.e inten.e*ting and al*o

take time,

I wa& toU&ed by a wonden&ul *et o£

ofitkodoK Jewi&h patient* who&e Live*

centered about my btwthen. and me.

Mot poon., but pKideiulty "con*en.vative"

60 that we neven. wanted what we couldn't

a^ond. So my "go to school," "go

to the libfuviy" wa* peaceful and

*ati* factory,,

by Pauline GolA^axb

THINKING AHEAD

by Nancy HamWton

As the time approaches at which,
by some definitions, I will be what
Americans term a "senior," I keep
waiting for a change of identification
within. Of course I am apprehensive
of physical disabilities, but these
have been happening to myself and
everyone I know all of our lives » What
is it, then, that marks one as being
"senior"?

A person who works, to a large
extent, with seniors says that it
is simply an age when everything
one has been is intensified. If
you were tending toward stubbornness,
then you are likely to be a tough
old coot, male or female; if you
were sweet and agreeable, you are
likely to be more so. Some time
ago a long list of tendencies of
older persons appeared in print, and
now that list seems important to me.

However, it seems to me, while
watching senior tendencies toward
disability grow, that one's discipline
or situation has much to do with
the way he or she turns out. For
instance, some kind of social settinq
is important to remind one of the
presence of human beings who require
one's concern. The relative number
of human beings surrounding one is
determined, apparently, by one's
past experience. We tend to be
loners or not loners. In any event,
it seems important to choose a sociable
life-setting early in the game.

When the young accept the
idiosyncrasies that accompany aging
it seems commendable to seniors.
This attitude, if condescending,
usually applies to physical disabili-
ties, but the young do not seem to
realize that the accidents or changes
can happen to anyone at any time. A
person simply recognizes this fact
more easily as he or she gets older.

Life has constant surprises, even
blows, from which we seen to either
recover with more fortitude than we
had, or don't recover at all. It
takes time, though, to learn this,
and that is perhaps what we do
learn. Many of us have lost someone
who meant much to us, and we do not
know why or what the message is„
This loss requires some kind of faith,
labeled or unlabeled. It does seem
that the only message for coping
with such losses and failures is
"let us love one another as much as
possible." "Accept" is perhaps
a better word in our society, in
which we do not really understand
the meaning of the word love as
used by others.

Our senior priorities differ,
patience seems a bit easier; not
really easy, if one is naturally
impatient, but easier, anyway. Things
that seemed so y/ery pressing a few
years back do not now seem so. Other
concerns do, like health, home, a
philosophy or religion to help us
along.

Periodically we worry about
external events, but at this age
more about what happens internally.
Some people worry effectively, or
pray, or somehow remain fine, pleasant,
wise people. I wish we all could. Also,
they seem healthy, despite known
physical problems. How they do it I
now wonder.

I have achieved many personal
triumphs during my life, but there
are still some I hope to achieve as
a senior. They include patience;
a sense of perspective which includes
humor; empathy with others, but not
the willingness to be drowned in
anyone's sorrow; the knowledge that
in all are attitudes inherited,
learned and earned; acceptance without
fighting what are genuine infirmities;
wisdom to know when something will
not help anyone, including myself;
ability to cope. All these are gifts,
and probably, if understood, the word

"grace,"

as "being given to one
without reason" is part of the
whole picture.

Nancy Hami&ton, a ioon-to-be AQ.ru.on.
KecentLy received hex maAteA'6
degree in Commmication Science at
Govexnont* State Unlvesuity. She.' 6
cuAAentty wonking ai an ouXn.ea.ch
voonkeA iofi Ea&testn I'lilZ. County
Senior SenviceA Ce.nteA t and coordinator
ofi the Community Votiwm fan the 1981
Uhite Hou&e Conference on Aging,

PHOTOS BY ARMIN WENG

nal Thoughts

COPING WITH DYING

by Suzanne. ?ne*cott

[Ed Mote Suzanne. Pn.e*cott, ?nohe**on
In the College, oh Human leaxning and
Development mate, down hex. thought*
and 6e.eLLng6 *eveXjal houx* ahtex hex
mothex died Rathex than keeping hex
tieaction* phivate the *haxed the*e
thought* with *ome oh hex colleague*
and *tudent*. She. hound thi* *haxtng
ex.pexi.ence u*eh^t In working thxough
the pn.obte.mt> o\ thi* cxi*i* pextod.
She al*o include* a second section
written two week* ahtex hex mothex
dLLed, which reveal* *ome additional
thouglvt* on the topic. In the thixd
section *he add* *ome Kehlection*
6 he wxote daxing the *eventh month
following hex. mothex'* death.)

Today my mother died— at 5 P.M.
The experience was more powerful than I
could have imagined it would be. As
my brother said, "You think you're
ready, but you're not."

We were called at 3 P.M. by the nurse
on the intensive care unit, who told
us that mother appeared to be weakening.
My brother and I arrived at the hospital
at 3:18. The nurse said that it
wouldn't be long before mother died.
At 4:22 my mother's "vital signs"
were weak but stable. At 4:45 they
started to weaken noticeably. A
small machine above her head showed
her heart weakening, slowing. A
small irridescent green line began
falling toward zero. It's telling
me that my mother is dying. It's
horribly exciting in a way which I
can't explain yet. Her breathing is
slowing like a runner after a race.
She doesn't breathe anymore. She's
dead.

At that moment, my brother grabbed
my hand and we both cried out. There
is a terrible, almost unspeakable
recognition. This is strange, too;
my brother and I have never been
honest about emotions with each other.

There are some important things
that led up to this experience.
About two months ago it became appar*-
ent to me that not only was my
mother quite ill, but that she was
frightened. I thought she might be
frightened of dying. I'm sure I was
right. I began to do what I could to
let her know that I knew of her fear
and I tried to be with her as often as
possible. I held her while she cried.
I felt that she was struggling with
the fear that her body was abandoning
her. I told her I knew it was frighten-
ing but that I loved her. I visited
her fairly often (there are never
enough times); I sent her flowers and
cards, and called on the phone. We
had good talks in the last month,
where we laughed together and shared
some intimate thoughts. But basically,
I think she was frightened and feeling
alone.

When she died, I felt as though I
was watching her slip back into a
void. I think she was afraid of
that void as she passed into it, as
she felt it coming closer. I let her
know that I was willing to face this
void with her — that I could make
this commitment. Facing death was
awesome to me, It reminded me of the
void in myself, the void I must one day
enter, and the void in all women.
This is a difficult situation that
women face. Most women must face their
own mother's death. My mother and I
faced it as two women afraid. I'm
sure there are numbers of women who
face death with frighteningl y less
support.

When
for the 1
that our
could be
that she
going on
what was
and a hal
watching

we arrived at
ast time, the
mother was as
expected, feel
wasn't aware o
around her.
called a "coma
f days. As we
her, I decided

the hospital
nurse told us
comfortable as
ing no pain, and
f what was
he had been in
" for two

stood there

to speak to

my mother. It was difficult at first.
I bent over her and my lips froze,
my throat constricted, but I forced
myself to talk. And the more I talked,
the easier it became, the more I felt
it was the correct thing to do.

I told her that we were there with
her, that I knew it was scary and that
it was all right, we loved her. I
stroked her brow, touched her cheeks,
squeezed her hands and kissed her. I
did what I could think of that seemed
right. I told her once that it was
okay to let go and she didn't have
to try so hard. I don't know and
can't know if she heard or felt me. I
was doing what I had to do.

I'm not at all sure that I would
have done this if I had not just been
reading an author who has always had
a powerful impact on me and who
prompts me to take action. I was
reading Lies, Secrets and Silence by
Adr i e nn e Rich. The presence of tha t
book in this critical situation
acted as a symbol and source of
strength and as a provocateur c I
began talking to my mother; so did
my brother and later my father. If
we had accepted what the medical
establishment said about her condition,
we all three would have stood there
in silence, and would not have said
a word to this dying woman.

I was surprised to find that after
I spoke some tears appeared in my
mother's eyes. Rheumy eyes are per-
haps a part of the process of dying
as body functions cease, give up their
harmony, lose control. It could have
been this, but it might have been
that she knew we were there. Later,
after we left her for a few minutes
while her temperature was taken, I
walked back to her to find her eyes
closed. I spoke to her to tell her
that I had returned, and her eyes
opened. My father and brother, who
had come into the room, said that
they thought she was looking at them.
I don't know. But I do know that if
we had just stood and let this woman
die alone, that it would have been a
mistake.

My father and brother had shown
little effort that I could observe to
deal with my mother's fear during
the last couple of months. Perhaps
they didn't know how, or weren't
aware of mother's fear. By their
silence, they made part of her invis-
ible, denying her incredible fear
and leaving her to deal with her
feelings by herself. By acting as
we did at the end we opened up a
possibility for action that I hope
we have the knowledge and conviction
to repeat.

In the couple of days before my
mother died I thought several times
of a poem by Garcia Lorca about the
death of a bullfighter. It begins:

At ^ive, in the. afiteAnoon

At exactly hive, in the. a^texnoon

A boy brought the white. hhe.e£. ...

My mother died at 5 P.M

♦ * *

Dear Florence,

Two weeks ago my mother died. Since
no one that familiar to me has ever
died, I was not aware of how powerful
this experience can be. A friend of
mine had been saying to "get ready
for it" but as my brother said,
"You think you're ready but you're
not." I imagine, as with your
father's death, there is an instant
of recognition when we realize a
person is no longer alive— something
very powerful occurs.

While I teach the aging course at
school and have fancied that I think
more often about death than most 37
year olds, yet I've been surprised at
how little I know about death, and
how successfully our culture hides
things from us that relate to death.
I was surprised at how much the
impersonal institutions that surround
death are controlled by men. The

last person to look at my mother's
face was a man from the funeral
home; religious significance was
granted to my mother by a man, a
priest; men carried my mother's
body, pallbearers; men controlled the
economic circumstances of death,
the style and content of it, the
funeral 'director,' the attorney,
the limosine driver, the cemetery
attendant. Watchdogs everywhere.
Few events in our culture are so
closely guarded. Why? Is there
some secret I've missed?

I was lucky in a way. By coinci-
dence I had just gotten a copy of
Lies, Secrets and Silence by Adrienne
Rich for a friend. Yet, I hadn't
read some of the essays. As I was
reading them, my mother was declining
rapidly— I had already talked with
her for the last time, though I
didn't know it. As we came toward
her death, I felt like a swimmer in
high water, like a crippled person.
This book became a powerful instrument
for me. Adrienne Rich is like a
provocateur. Her poetry and essays
lead me to action. Even as I stood
at the hospital bed looking down at
my mother, my brief-case was propped
up against her night stand with the
book inside it, and I said to myself,
"Can I do this now? Am I strong
enough to do what should be done? What
would she do? If she were here she
would approve of what I'm doing. I
imagine that she js^ here." These are
strange thoughts to have beside one's
dying mother.

Several hours after my mother died
I wrote of my experience. I'm enclos-
ing a copy of it. I wanted to get as
much out of the experience as possible
before it merged with my unconscious
history. As Rich says in a recent
poem, she fights against the temptation
to make pain a career, and it is
a temptation because it seems like the
pain is part of our flirtation with
understanding and giving meaning. There
is a battle going on at the boundary of
our consciousness. Some of these
things I'm conscious about, others are

shadowy, and others I'm sure I know
nothing about, and it does seem that
some significant part of this battle
is finding out what it is I'm
fighting. After I wrote it, I thought
of giving it to my colleagues and
friends. But I thought, "This 1s so
personal, you're not supposed to write
about these things. People will
think you're crazy."

The next day I was at the Univer-
sity, having copies of what I'd
written distributed. "Ready or not
here I come!" I thought. I began
my class that evening by saying,
"Today was a day like no other in
my life; today was my mother's
funeral"... and then I plunged
right in. I didn't know what to
expect, and what happened was really
remarkable. We obviously got very
close to something that many people
are trying to deal with; people,
especially women, were making connec-
tions. My concern with what has gone
on so far is this: to define what is
honorable and then to do it. The
dilemma as I faced it months before
her death was how to maintain integri-
ty, for my mother and I were not
close in many ways. There were times
during the last couple of months
when we created both closeness and an
illusion of closeness. It was the
illusion that challenged my integrity.
On the one hand I was moved to help
a dying woman and on the other hand,
to be as honest as possible about the
problems of our relationship. There
were some sacrifices of honesty as
I chose to be helpful. This choice is
one I still feel comfortable with.

If the experience a
of death is oppressive
lightening, I wonder i
enough from the experi
form the institution o
we change the institut
it's more appropriate
death? I wish we coul
more meaningfully, and
participating could be
in improving the exper
that we will have one

nd institution
and yet en-
f we can learn
ence to trans-
f death? Can
ion so that
for our own
d participate
that our own
an investment
ience of death
day. I know

you have had similar thoughts. Care
to share them? Love, Suzanne

* * *

There is a way in which my writing
about my mother's death created a
seamless web, a story in which all
the parts fitted together. And yet
looking back on the experience there
were elements that didn't fit, elements
that were left out and which now
seem more important to me. For
instance, when I arrived at the hos-
pital, a nurse tried to be comforting
by pointing out that my mother was
feeling no pain and would die very
quickly. She added, "And your mother
was such a good person." I looked at
her and said, "I don't know if she was
a good person, but that's irrelevant
now." At that moment I hadn't yet
realized that my mother, who was
lying there, could very possibly
hear my comment . I have thought
about this often. I wonder if this is
one of the last remarks that my mother
heard me make before she died. I
wonder what this meant to my mother,
what thoughts and responses she could
not give to this commento I think about
this, and it hurts.

I also remember looking at my
mother's naked body, just minutes
before she died. Her body looked like
mine, I thoughto She was alive and
yet I knew that minutes later she
would not be.

If only there were some way
to stall.. ..I had the thought that
thirty-seven years earlier I had come
out of her body; now she was strug-
gling, not with birth, but with death e
My own body, large and strong, would
one day lie, like hers, at the moment
of death. I wondered if anyone else
had had similar thoughts while
watching their mother die c

Occasionally I awaken thinking
of something that I must tell my
mother, and then realize that I no
longer can.

Sometimes when I least expect
it, I see my mother's face lying on
the hospital bed, the blood and
tubes and her face struggling and
contorted with what I imagine as
hopeless fear. I hear the rattling
of her breathing.

These are the fragments that
don't fit. The synecdoche is
elusive.

FROM ADRIENNE RICH'S, LIES, SECRETS,
AND SILENCE

The. tmpontant thing about Aa%ienne ZLch
ion. me <Lt> that the. &uan6{ i o>im6 fieatity
and QJieateA pobhtbXJLLLleA ^on. action
that I am capable o^ tcecogniztng,
Hexe axe home thought* l>wm L-ceA,
Secxett, and Silence that I've
Kexead A,n the. la&t fiei*) day&

Men have been expected to tell the
truth about facts, not about feelings.
They have not been expected to talk
about feelings at all.

Lying is done with words, and also
with silence.

The liar often suffers from amnesia.
Amnesia is the silence of the
unconscious... the unconscious
wants truth. It ceases to speak to
those who want something else more
than truth.

In speaking of lies, we come to the
subject of truth. There is nothing
simple or easy about this idea. There
is no "the truth"~truth is not one
thing, or even a system. It is an
increasing complexity. This is why
the effort to speak honestly is so
important. Lies are usually attempts
to make everything simpler — for
the liar--than it really is, or
ought to be.

In lying to others we end up lying
to ourselves. We deny the importance
of an event, or a person, and thus
deprive ourselves of a part of our
lives. Or we use one piece of the
past or present to screen out another.
Thus, we lose faith even with our
own lives.

An honorable human relationship--
that is one in which two people have
the right to use the word "love"--
is a process, delicate, violent,
often terrifying to both persons
involved, a process of refining the
truths they can tell each other

It is important to do this because
it breaks down human self-delusion,
and isolation.

It is important to do this because
in so doing we do justice to our
own complexity.

It is important to do this because
we can count on so few people to
go that hard way with us.

And so v/e must take seriously the
question of truthfulness between
women, truthfulness among women. As
we cease to lie with our bodies, as
we cease to take on faith what men
have said about us, is a truly
womanly idea of honor in the making?

There is a danger run by all powerless
people: that we forget we are lying,
or that lying becomes a weapon we
carry over into relationships with
people who do not have power over us.

SHADOWS

by Linda Be.ck

My mother's sister Sophie, who
was my favorite aunt, died last October
while my parents were visiting me.
My parents had chosen to escape
facing the inevitability of their own
mortality by making my dirty house a
priority: an attempt to reassure
themselves of a painless world.

The expected phone call came one
evening. My brother-in-law asked
me not to tell Ma that Sophie had died,
but was "near the end" and to come
home. The sudden sag in my posture and
accompanying tears conveyed the message
to mother, and with a gasp that I
shall never forget, she expelled, "my
sister," as though she, too, were let-
ting go. She became very small. My
mother might be the next to die, and
I became afraid. My father, sitting
in the next room, grew quiet and grew
old at that moment.

I've been watching my parents
grow old and I hate it. My father's
hand, once so firm and secure for me,
now shakes as he lifts his soup. No
one comments, except for my son, his
youngest grandchild. "Papa, you
got shakey hands, but that's O.K. cause
sometimes I have shakey hands too."
My father's eyes were operated on for
cataracts and his unsteady footing has
to be carefully watched. His youthful
energy no longer exists and it often
takes my mother's nagging to get him
out of bed. Every so often I see him
watching something out of the corner of
his eye. His face seems to darken.
Dammit! Where is that smile, like a
halloween pumpkin, that used to let me
know that all was O.K., keeping the
goblins away?

Boadicea, my mother, no longer
can do battle and we have both padded
our weapons. Her strength and her will
were the rocks upon which I could
sharpen my metal and forge my being.
She would marshal 1 her army of know-
ledge and interests and over the years,

the battle raged for me to acquire not
only those lands but many more, and I
did. I learned well from that old
warrior queen. Now, I see her retreat
in defeat, as my grandmother did at
the end of her reign, and wonder if
I wi 11 , too .

I see my mother's hand get stiff
and swollen with arthritis and watch
her rings grow. She drops her needles
when knitting. Again, no one comments
except for the grandson: "Nana, you
dropped your needle." Those hands,
in their spare time, have manufactured
countless sweaters, booties, afghans
and hats to keep us all warm. I wonder
if I will be able to be warm after
she dies? She drops her needle; she
is loosing her grasp and it terrifies
me. She falls asleep in her chair;
she never used to. She, too, keeps a
close watch on something.

As their bones get brittle, I
hear their minds getting rigid. The
broad libertarian thinking that sparked
heated discussions around the kitchen
table, anarchy and open minds, have now
become narrow and self-serving.

Powerlessness is the life-ebbing
feeling and the experience much like
a brownout; dim light, vague forms.
Where are my mother and father?
Becoming memories and shadows. I hate
it. If those rocks and smiles disap-
pear, how do I measure my metal and
joy? If I no longer have parents,
I can no longer be a child. When will
the lights go on again and the power
return? What will I see?

( Linda Becfe t& a paAX-tune. (v\t
Ihenaptht in the. Adjunctive. TheAapy
UvvLt oh the. p^ychixutJiic toand at the.
Hin&dale. UoApitaZ)

DYING, AN INTEGRAL STAGE OF THE
HUMAN PHENOMENON: COMMENTARY ON
WRITINGS OF DR. ELIZABETH
KUBLER-ROSS

by Many Lou Rogo^

God giant me the. &exe.nity to accept

the thtngA I cannot cliange

the. courage to change, the thing*

I can
and the. ivt6dom to know the di^efience,

Over the past two decades, Dr.
Elizabeth Kubler-Ross has taught us
a great deal about death. She has
explored pre-death experiences,
death itself, and after-death
experiences. She has had the courage,
flexibility and sensitivity to
relate to terminally ill persons and
their families. She has given them
a sense of hope, peace and understand-
ing as they go through the death
experience. In this respect, she
has relentlessly pursued what must
be a y/ery lonely path, offering
warm understanding, valuable insights
and humanistic meaning to professionals,
as well as dying persons and their
families. She has not been afraid
to approach dying people and become
involved in what, for many, was a
very frightening experience.

Her contributions have been
creative, unique and sorely needed
in a society which promotes feelings
of denial regarding human mortality.
Though we may try to postpone
confronting issues of death and
dying, the reality of life forces
us to face it eventually.

In her first work, On Death and
Dying , she describes five stages of
dying. The first stage is denial.
The terminally ill person protests
"no not me, it cannot be true."
Dr. Kubler-Ross suggests that people
should contemplate the possibility
of their own death in order to deal
more effectively with traumas and
loss, refocusing on the human aspects
of terminally ill persons and the

experience of loss. If our society
continues to deny these important
issues, isolation becomes greater for
all involved in the death experience
Death is frightening. Fear of the
unknown triggers feelings previously
unencountered by most people. Un-
fortunately, death and loss must be
dealt with alone by each individual.
Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross indicates
that people who use denial as a
major defense in their lives will
use denial much more extensively
while dying. Those who in the past
have faced situations openly, will
face death in the same manner. Denial,
she points out, however, nay also
serve temporarily to buffer unexpected,
shocking news, allowing people the
time to collect themselves and mobilize
other, less radical defenses.

When this first stage can no
longer be maintained, it is replaced
by feelings of anger, resentment,
and rage--the "why me" stage. This
anger expressed by the dying person
is very difficult for family, friends,
and staff to handle. Usually the
anger is displaced in all directions,
projected randomly to almost anyone.
Again, this stage will be more difficult
for people who have not realistically
dealt with their earlier feelings
of anger and rage. People who carry
anger or are chronic fighters will
rebel even at the moment of death.

Guilt, shame, and grief are common
for family and friends to feel at
times of death. These feelings are not
far removed from rage and anger. In
fact, the grief process always includes
some qualities of anger. Since we
do not like to admit feelings of
anger toward a dying person, we often
disguise or repress these emotions.
Consequently, we may prolong the
period of grief or view these emotions
as bad or shameful. Put as Dr.
Kubler-Ross points out, it is best
to understand their true origin
and meaning as something very human.

If the dying person has been
unable to face the fact of death in

the first stage and has been angry
with people and God in the second
phase, he may then try to bargain with
himself and others by entering into
some sort of agreement. In this
phase the patient accepts the fact
of death but bargains for more time.
Mostly he bargains with God. He
promises to be good or to do something
in exchange for another week or month
or year of life. What he promises is
irrelevant because he cannot really
carry out these promises. However,
this may, in his mind, postpone
the inevitable. Dr. Kubler-Ross indi-
cates that this stage of "yes me, but"
is less well known and is usually
brief. It may be very helpful to
the dying person unless it continues
for too long.

The fourth stage Dr. Kubler-Ross
identifies is depression, in which
an attempt is made to resolve past
and pending loss of everything and
everyone loved. However, if allowed
to express this sorrow, the dying
person will find the final acceptance
much easier. However, he may
experience another form of depression
if those around him refuse to accept
the reality of his death. Their
attitude can cause great grief and
turmoil. To die in peace and
acceptance this stage of depression
is necessary, and can only be
achieved if the person has been
able to work through his anguish
and anxieties.

With enough time to work through
the previous stages, the final days
will bring a certain amount of quiet
acceptance. Acceptance is not
necessarily a happy stage. It is
almost void of feelings: pain is gone,
the struggle is over and the person
experiences a final rest.

What usually lasts through each
of these stages is hope which
sustains the dying person through
months of suffering. It is the
belief that all of this has some
meaning and will pay off if he can
only endure a little longer.

Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross has
beautifully described these five
stages of dying. The acceptance
of his death by others is crucial
for the terminally ill person. Only
then can he grow through this process
of grief toward his own acceptance.
A person's acceptance of his own
being and significance depends
upon knowing that he is accepted by
someone or something other than him-
self. Acceptance is the beginning
of emotional growth. Death and life
are inseparable. Dr. Kubler-Ross
has learned that death offers people
an unparalleled opportunity to
discover life's true meaning. It
is a time when people come to terms
with their own finiteness and get
their final chance to grow and to
become more truly human. In our
culture death is primarily viewed
as a negative experience. Vie can
learn from the insights of Or.
Elizabeth Kubler-Ross how to make
living a more fully human, loving,
growth producing experience.

Death is inevitable. It will
assuredly occur and we should
anticipate this experience as much
or more than other significant life
experiences. Death is not an enemy
to fear, but an integral part of our
lives. When contemplated, it can
give us a clearer perspective on
who we are and what we have done. It
offers us a chance to grow more fully
into the person we wish to be. We
need to act now to attain what
we want to experience in life. Denial
of the reality of death keeps us from
finding a sense of peace and well-
being in life. Freedom is the key
to well-being. The secret of freedom
is the willingness to accept loss-
even of life. Attachment, on the
other hand, promotes human suffering—
the unwillingness to let go.

From the dying person, we can
learn to live each day more fully.
This does not mean living frantically,
accumulating experiences, but
instead to more fully experience the
reality of each moment, by being in

tune with our true selves, lie need
strength to deal with life's disap-
pointments and pain, and strive to
discover and sustain the joys of
life. People who have never dealt
in daily living with their internal
conflicts — anger, depression and
grief cannot experience true freedom
either. Those who accept and make
peace with death are usually the ones
who have settled the issues, fulfilled
their hopes and dreams, experienced
love and being loved, contributed
positively to others and discovered
who they are existentially.

In the words of Pr. Kubler-Ross,
"Sometimes I wonder why we profession-
als make such a big nightmare out of
death and dying. Ry prolonging life
at all costs, we proceed on the assump-
tion that the human consists only of
the physical body." Her work suggests
that we are an immortal consciousness
inhabiting a transient physical form.
She feels our present day scientific
understanding of the human phenomenon
is limited. If, as she implies, there
is more to the human phenomenon than
the experience of "life" as we know it
and if it is really possible that
consciousness is neither created
nor destroyed, then what is "death"?

She believes there is meaning to
suffering. The syndrome of shock,
denial, anger, bargaining, and
depression is not unique to death
but is frequently part of painful
life experiences. People whose lives
are marked by tragedy experience
Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross' s five
stages of dying with each catastrophe.
Loss is equated with death if we be-
come attached to that which we must
relinquish. Pr. Kubler-Ross calls
these "little deaths."

I turn a nace
with the 6etting 6un t

6tAlvlng to live,

% efie my day Is done

Facing death,
that I may know Hie;
£ok awaKene66 o& death

gives me.anA.ng to H&e;
I mouAn not 60 much

the dead,
as Living dead!

Gxlevlng not

the. £.066 o£ H{e t
but natheA,

the. tack o& tifa;
"I nage not

at my dying,
bat at the. dead place*

In tifal

So I 6tAuggle to take,

my place In the. 6un;
to 6lng all my 6ong,

' exe. my day Is done.;
to blo66om

and ^loweA,
'exe. the. ^Inal houn

when my nace Is n.un.

[Enom "The Race" by Hal Rogo^)

Pr. Kubler-Ross practiced general
medicine in Switzerland before
coming to this country. She began
her work with terminally ill patients
while teaching psychiatry at the
University of Chicago. Pr. Kubler-
Ross will be remembered throughout
psychiatric history as one who
taught her colleagues to think of
the dying person as a human being.
Her contributions have been profound
and her dedication unsurpassed.

BIBLIOGRAPHY

KubleA-Ro66 , Etizabeth On Veath And

Vying . New Votik: lAactteJJUm

Publishing Co„, Inc, 1969.
Kublen.-Ro66 , Elizabeth Questions

On Veath and Vying New Yotik:

MacmlZlan Publishing Co., Inc.,

1974.
KubleA-Ro66 , Vfi. Elizabeth Veath

The Y-lnal Stage oj Gfiowth . Englewood

CHfifa, New JeAsey: Pientlce-Hall,

Inc., 1975.
KubleA-Ro66 f Vn. Elizabeth To Live

Until We, Say Good-Bye . tnglen)ood

Cllfifa, New JeA6ey: Ptientice-Hall

Inc., 1978
Oyle, Vk. living The New American

Medicine Show . Santa Oluz, CA:

Unity Pne66, 1979.

VROUWENHUIS

DEN HAAG

LETTER FROM HOLLAND

When you enter the Vrouwenhuis
(Women's House) at 15 Pavlova Street
in the Hague, you are greeted with
an open handshake and an offer of
a cup of coffee. In this gracious
place, provided by an all -volunteer
staff, you learn that the purpose
of Vrouwenhuis is to raise the gen-
eral level of consciousness of women
about their situation, and to help
them understand that their problems
are not their fault, but that they
are rather the problems of society.

My guide is Ineke van Wilsum
and she tells me that women come
here on Valium, sleeping pills, with
many troubles, and that here they
find that their troubles are not
theirs alone. This relieves much
quilt and anxiety, for these women
often cannot talk to the professional
helpers. Why not? "The professional
helpers only translate the male
attitude." Ineke continues: "At
Vrouwenhuis we say to the women who
come: 'We are in the same situation
as you.' We counsel in groups
using Maslow-oriented radical therapy
because it is a soft, gentle therapy
and because we believe that every-
body is as good at this as anyone
else."

The women who come to Vrouwen-
huis are depressive women, with few
personal contacts. Along with the
group counseling there are also
lessons in French, English and
other languages and courses to
broaden their world view. On the
political side, there are demonstra-
tions for the right to an abortion,
for working women to have time off
for breastfeeding, better working
conditions. There is a special
club for women between 45 and 55
who are facing memopausal -related
problems. Other activites at the
house include karate lessons, a
choir and a film series. They also
publish Rosa , a magazine by and
for women.

The concern for older people
which I saw at the Women's House
seemed typical to me of the Dutch
sense of social responsibility and
conscientious care for persons of
all segments of society,, In the
neighborhood where I live there
are many people in their eighties,
still going out to the local shops
to do their daily errands— active,
alert and vigorous .
(See Lynn Strauss' interview with
MrSo Henny.)

As we have assembled the arti-
cles for this issue on The Coming
Of Age , in the wonderful expression
of Simone de Beauvoir, I have
remembered my parents. I was a
child of eleven when my parents
entered that stage of life which
we now refer to as "aging." I
didn't know that they were aging.
I knew that they were my parents.
My father, still strong in the
pulpit still proclaiming his
opinions on the events of the day
with authority. My mother, her full
hair brown and richly piled on her
head with no trace of grey tending
her garden, leading the book dis-
cussion group and teaching elementary
school. We went, the three of us,
to a retirement community in Florida.
To me, they were not "old." They
were Mamma and Papa. My parents.
Wise, capable of meeting any emer-
gency, knowing how to take care of me.

Long after retirement my parents
went on to drive from Florida to
Maine and back every year during
their seventies; and to fly about
the country visiting offspring
during their eighties. Eventually
they slowed, faded and finally
died without ever actually being
sick in their nineties. Yes, even
they finally became old and died.

And now I think of my brothers
and sisters, in their sixties and
seventies, and their different
lifestyles in retirement. Ben and
Dorothy have made gardening and
tree farming a way of life. Lee

writes that it is important to
travel and experiment with various
activities before 65: "Don't put
off until retirement your possible
retirement activity," she urges.
Barbara, living on the Maine coast,
reports that she never gets bored:
"If I get restless all I need to do
is to hike by the sea or in the
woods — it's all heaven to me!"

As my older brothers and sisters
enter their seventies and eighties
and nineties, I plan to keep a close
watch on them. I want to find out
from them how to do it. As always
my brothers and sisters are inspira-
tional models for me.

Readers who wish to share the
mature reflections of a complete
person will enjoy These Vintage
Years by Margot Benary-Isbert
(Abingdon Press, 1965). She writes
"I prefer to call old age an adven-
ture while others may call it a
calamity. The difference is that a
calamity has to be endured passively;
an adventure must be accepted actively,
To accept the challenge of adventure
means freedom, though every adven-
ture involves risks." Her book is
a rich testament to the pleasures
of a time when "ripeness is alio"
From her book I selected the
following quotations:

"DOING is all that counts in life;
enjoying and suffering look after
themselves," - Goethe

"And now in age I bud again;
After so many deaths I live and
write." - George Herbert

"To live life to the end is not a
child's task " - Pasternak

HdtnYi B. Hug/i&s, Editon.

BOOK REVIEW by Shannon M. Tnoy

Life After Youth: Female, Forty—
What Next? by Ruth Harriet Jacobs,,
Boston: Beacon Press, 1979 c

This relatively brief work by an
over-forty, female doctor of sociology
takes a realistic look at the major
roles available to most over-forty
women today. Based on sociological
research funded by the National
Institute of Mental Health, Dr.
Jacobs' book centers on the ten-part
typology of the older woman that
she originally developed for an
article in the journal Soc i a I Po I i cy .
The available roles are nurturer,
either engaged, unutilized, or re-
engaged; chum networker; careerist,
employed or unemployed; seeker;
faded beauty; doctorer; escapist and
isolate; and advocate and assertive
older woman.

Far from being a dull, scholarly
treatise, Life After Youth illustrates
its major points with graphic case
studies of real women living out
one of these available roles. And
much of the essence of their experiences
is engrossing but not pleasant — to
read or to I i ve.

Many of the themes that appear in
other works by and about women are
here— poor jobs at low pay; the
problems of working or attending
school while being the prime or sole
caretaker of home and children;
guilt; negative self-image But the
factor of age — female and over forty —
adds a special dimension. To quote
from the author's introduction,
"The callous way Americans generally
treat older women is a thermometer of
a destructive fever afflicting our
civilization... Older women, who are
seldom the object of men's erotic
fantasies or fathering impulses, can
safely be made the scapegoats for
past stresses... and present ones....
Sadly enough, even young women often
despise older women, seeing them as
hourglasses in which to read,
correctly, their own bitter fate."(p c 9)

In Chaper Ten the author acknow-
ledges what the reader has long known —
that this book is more than a relation
of how things are for many women. It
is an advocacy work — an exposure of the
bad situations and lack of options
that many older women suffer, in
order that some change for the better
might be attempted. And if ever a
group deserved an advocacy piece it
is this one: "They (older women) were
taught to be honest, warm, helpful,
compromising— not devious, withholding,
adamant, or hostile. If they find
themselves becoming angry, they feel
guilty even if the hostility is
well justified... . Unused to combat,
they throw away their weapons and
creep away." (p. 151)

Life After Youth has its flaws —
occasional bursts of emotionalism,
and failure to pinpoint the sources
of some statistics presented. But
despite them, It is still a work
that concerned citizens, male and
female, shoud read. Beyond the fact
that among the women concerned are
our mothers, aunts, sisters, friends,
is the consideration that population
trends make older women the wave of
the future. As Jacobs says on page
one, "Often what are seen as individual
troubles are really public issues.
This republic cannot afford to have
a significant and growing proportion
of its population continue to be
"underpaid, underutilized, under-
recognized, and under loved." It's
not legal, it's not humane, it's not
sound economics. But in order to
change this unhappy state, it must
first be recognized for the social
problem that it Is — by the citizenry
at large and especially by the women
affected.

Ms Jfioy i6 CoonxUnaton. o£ Libfuaxy
U&esi Education h-on the. GoveAnon*
State. Unive/uity Ltbsia/iy She. i&
a candidate. Ion a Voctonate. in
Public Administration l n.om Nova
UniveA&iAy*

Your sympathy cannot
help a refugee.

But it is a beginning.

UNHCR is the Office of the United
Nations High Commissioner for Refugees.

Our job is to co-ordinate the world-
wide voluntary efforts to solve refugee
problems.

To give the rights of man back to
refugees. The right to work, to education.
Freedom of religion. Identity papers.
Travel documents. Legal protection.

You can show your solidarity with
people in need by supporting the voluntary
refugee organisations in your country.

They don't ask your help to support
refugees forever and ever.

They need your help to make refugees
self-supporting.

Living a useful, peaceful and happy life
somewhere in the world. Just as you do.

United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees.

DISAPPOINTMENTS IN COPENHAGEN
btj Hulan E. Hughe*

There was not just one UN Decade
of Women Conference meeting in
Copenhagen this summer. There were
many. They differed in startling
ways in terms of their character,
ambiance and ef fectiveness There
were: the official UN Conference
at the Bella Center; the alternative
conference of Non-Governmental
Organizations — the Forum — held a few
miles away at the campus of the
University of Denmark; the Inter-
national Festival of Women Artists
held at the Glyptotek Gallery in
Copenhagen; the committees that did
the real work of the UN Conference;
the workshops and seminars, films and
lectures that were spin-offs of the
Forum; the sessions in people's
homes and hotel rooms, restaurants,
bus stops, trains, and in the airport
where there was interaction and
conversation, argument and confronta-
tion, news, and finally, exchange of
names and addresses.

First, the official UN Confer-
ence, heavily guarded by armed secur-
ity officers, admitting only official
delegates or those with official press

passes. Well, not quite true: one
is persistent and one gets in Others
could enter at certain hours under
certain conditions; we had to surrender
personal effects at the door — notebook,
camera, tape recorder, and even
wallet and passport „ The plenary
session meets in a large hall in the
Bella Center, a modern trade-show
building. Delegates of 152 countries
are seated in semicircular rows of
tables, each nation identified by a
plaque, each equipped with a
microphone and headsets through which
to hear what ever was going on trans-
lated into a language that she could
understand. I seated myself just
behind the PLO delegation, always
crowded by the media people who seemed
to outnumber the delegates themselves
I sat through one entire day of
formal UN presentations. One after
another they rose to speak from the
podium: Turkey, Czechoslovakia, Peru,
Lebanon, PLO, Switzerland, Ethiopia,
Israel, USA. Each speaker praised
the enlightened attitude toward women
of her nation and cited the equality
guaranteed under their constitution.
It was the voice not of the women of
the world, but women speaking as the
mouthpieces of the State Departments
of the governments of the world.
Listening to them, one could not know

of the impact on women of the political
assassinations, violations of human
rights, oppression or terrorism which
every daily newspaper reported . The
Lebanese insulted the Israel is The
Israelis defended themselves. The
Americans protested that the Confer-
ence was being perverted to national-
istic and political purposes that were
irrelevant to the agenda of the
conference. The excessively formal,
bureaucratic nature of the procedures
at the Bella Center were epitomized
when Natalia Malakhovskaya, one of
three underground Soviet feminists,
publishers of Almanakh, Women and
Russia , having been expelled from the
USSR, arrived in Copenhagen and was
not permitted to address the confer-
ence. It was by turns disheartening
or boring. But, the translations that
one could select through one's
headset went far beyond what most of
us are likely to experience c Not
just English, French, German, Spanish,
Italian but also Russian, Arabic,
Chinese. When the speeches became
too boring to endure I tried listen-
ing to them in Russian, Arabic or
Chinese. I decided the most beautiful
language sounds were Chinese. (Was
that a function of the particular
Chinese translator's beautiful voice
and diction? Have recent events
created so much anger in me against
some people who speak Russian or
Arabic that part of me simply closes
down?) One day of that was enougho

At the Forum, the scene was com-
pletely different: colorful, noisy,
full of energy and life, with a mul-
titude of causes being freely
presented and debated „ Here were the
corridors and open spaces of a univer-
sity building, packed with booths,
wall hangings, posters, notices of
meetings and workshops, exhibits of
handicrafts, buttons and banners of
all kinds for sale or for giving
away. One could wander happily for
hours, just looking at things and
people, admiring the infinite diver-
sity of the traditional dress in which
women from a I I parts of the world
adorned themselves. If the vibes were

largely negative at the UN Conference,
here they were positive, upbeat, heady
with the air of freedom. Among the
dozens of workshops and seminars announ-
ced daily were groups around wages
for housework, lesbian rights,
employment, health, abuse of pharma-
ceuticals, breastfeeding, appropriate
technology, among many others.

I walked into a room where
Iranian women were about to show a
film about their Islamic Revolution.
It was packed, with many standing at
the sides and back of the room. An
Iranian woman was talking and answering
questions while we waited for the film
to be delivered. She spoke excellent
American-English (learned in the United
States where she grew up and attended
a state university). She wore "modest
dress", rather than the chador, which
means that she was completely covered,
with a headscarf over her hair, but
did not wear the veil. During the
weeks just preceding the Copenhagen
conference the news media had been
reporting two events which raised
grave questions about the status of
women in Islamic countries. There
had been the TV docu-drama, Death of
a Princess, about the execution of
Saudi Arabian woman for eloping
without her male relatives' consent.
And there was the case of the
Iranian "student militant" who had
become pregnant by one of the
American hostages, and whose brother,
when she told him, executed her by
hanging. And the week preceding the
conference, five thousand Iranian
women who were government workers
had demonstrated in the streets of
Tehran against the "modest clothing"
requirement.

So I raised my hand with a question:
"What are the rights of women under
Islamic law? The women in this room
are interested to know what her
relation is to a brother, father, or
grandfather, and whether he has the
right, under Islamic law, to rule
over her, even to the taking of her
life."

Her reply, "I don't know what
context you speak from,, <>. but in
Islam women are equals to men Most
women prefer the traditional role
secured for them by the Revolution,
in which they enjoy the protection
of a male. Male protection prevents
women from being abused or exploited,,"
A murmur of incredulity passed over
the crowded room. Then an English
woman asked directly about the woman
who was hung by her brother. "Well,
her brother was arrested..." we
were told, and suddenly it was time
to see the film of the Iranian
Revolution. This brief interchange
was typical of the kinds of encounters
among women at the Forum; even though
we were plainly from opposite sides
of deeply felt convictions, there
: at least was the possibility and arena
for dialogue.

Such dialogue often painfully
displayed the gaps and dissonances
in consciousness, especially when
women of the Northern Hemisphere
and women of the Southern Hemisphere
faced each other on issues such as
female genital mutilation in small
[ tribal societies in Africa. A
seminar had been called by Swedish
women to discuss what was seen as a
tragic and cruel form of violence
against women (cl itoridectomy) as
oppression and as a means of maintaining
the subjugation of women, and to discuss
how best to oppose the practice,,
The African women were angry and offend-
ed. To them it was just another ex-
ample of imperialistic attitudes, of
Europeans deploring "savage barbarism,"
and they were highly insulted. Many
of these women were struggling to main-
tain some of the values of their
! traditional cultures against the
I ravages of an alien mechanistic,
. technological, materialistic invasion
of western culture, felt by them as
"the rape of Africa,," They wanted
liberal do-gooders to stay away from
their traditional practices, to worry
about removing oppression in their
own countries, and asserted "We don't
like it, we have to change it in our
own way, in our own time, and in the

context of our own culture." Tough
lessons for liberal Swedes and others!

At the Glyptotek Gallery a very
different set of events was
happening: films, slide shows, lectures
and exhibits every day by women artists
from the world. Betye Saar, member
of the Advisory Council of The Creative
Woman , and guest editor of our special
issue on women in art, was there,
showing her film "Spirit Catcher,"
lecturing, and appearing at a symposium,,
The organizers of the International
Festival of Women Artists had arranged
for all of the artists who had been
invited to participate in the festival
to be housed and entertained in the
homes of Danish women in the arts.
The stimulation and ferment, the
cross-fertilization of ideas, the
wonderful sense of shared affirmation
of each other's struggles and triumphs,
provided high points of the
Copenhagen experience,,

Then there were the real working
groups, the UN committees who worked
daily for ten days on resolutions and
reports, to whose deliberations this
reporter was not privy,

There are many revolutions going
on in the world today The women's
movement is only one, but it is a
critical one,, I heard Palestinian
women say "I'll fight for equality
after I've won the battle for free-
dom." I heard an African woman say,
"Equal rights may interest me after
I've won the right to survive."
An American black woman told me,
"Racism is the first enemy; after
we've licked that, we'll talk
about sexism." For the Bolivian
women, their return home meant re-entry
into a country that had been taken over
by a military junta, and in which
they might be jailed or killed, for
a I I they knew.

If we look at the position of
women worldwide, the inescapable
conclusion is that we are in many
ways worse off now than we were in
1975 when the UN declared the

International Year of the Woman e
Economic crises and wars wreak a
special havoc on women. Refugees now
number fourteen million! Since
November 1979, when the Soviets invaded
Afghanistan, another million has
been added to that ghastly figure.
Of all refugees, worldwide, two-thirds
are women and children., Of the
Afghans who are now in camps in
Pakistan, 90$ are women and children,,
Refugee women need every kind of
support service that can be imagined,
from nutritional and basic shelter
to health, family planning, child
care, and ways to become economically
capable of survival in a foreign land.
The plaintive cry of the eternal exile,
"How shall I sing the song of the
Lord in a strange land?" is heard
from mi I I ions of voices. Whoever has
ears to hear, let them hear!

Well, yes, it was many confer-
ences,, I only observed a small frac-
tion of the goings-on in Copenhagen
The real conference was probably taking
place in the many small committee
meetings of the UN where women met and
talked and argued and discussed and
presented plans for action, for hours,
days, and nights for two weeks,, For
a delegate from the Netherlands,
Letitia van den Assum, this was the
exciting reality and meaning of the
UN conference,, Resolutions were
passed, to be taken back to home
governments, that can change the
situation and status of women in the
worldo Concrete political, social,
economic gains can be made,, In the
welter of many voices, some raised
in anger and hatred, the positive
aspects of Copenhagen may be lost.
In the long march of women toward
peace, freedom and eguality,
Copenhagen may indeed be appreciated
as another stepping stone,, At the
very least, several thousand women
went home with something new to
think about, talk about and share,,

VW VOU KNOW??

Gnandma Hose* bzgan painting at
ago. 80 becxwusz hen h^geAS wene. no
Zongen. nimbJLe. enough faon. nee.dJLeu)onk.
We one hoAJi to 1,000 oh heA painting*
and at age. 100 she. hound time, to do
25 mo fie.

At 92 Ge.on.gz BeAnand Shaw was
wniting play*

At 91 Eamon de. ValeAa seAve.d a*
pn.ejtiide.nt oh JneJband

At 89 Albent SchwettzeA headzd
a hospital in Afintca.

At 87 Konnad Ade.nau.eA was chanceJUUon
0& Genxmny.

Foun yeaAS ago, at 80, Geonge. BuAns
won an academy awand &on hit> peAhonmance.
in "The Sunshine Boy*,"

Ton SO yean* Anthun. Fiedten and
the. Boston Pops 0nche*tAa bnought the
joys oh music, to million* night up
to his death last yean at age. 84.

YOU KNOW YOU ARE GETTING OLDER, WHEN

-Everything hurts, and what doesn't

hunt, doesn't wonk.

-You feel like the morning after the

night before, and you haven't be.en

anywheAt.

-You join a health club and then you

don't go.

-You hear the phone ring and hope it

Isn't hon you.

-Your mind savs "an" but unit* body

*ay* "no."

You send your picture to the lonely

hearts club and the.y se.nd it back.

-The problem now is not in resisting

temptation but in h^^dUng it.

-When thoughts of passion twin to

thoughts oh pension.

-When you go to the dentist to get

youn dentxxAejs cappe.d.

-When all the phone numbers in your

little black book one. docton*' .

(adapted from Keen-Ager News,
August 1980. Catholic Charities
of Chicago)

Delina Pearl Ziemer, grandmother of graphic designer Suzanne Oliver,
Thanksgiving, 1972. Photo taken by Ruth Thorne-Thomsen.

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